


Humanities Okami

by Wolfish160



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, M/M, Military Police, Orginal Characters, Thug Levi, ereri, outside of the walls, survey corpes, trigger for rape and sexual harrassment, underground city, will not add relationship tags so there will be surprise
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-28
Updated: 2017-11-21
Packaged: 2018-08-11 16:00:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 29,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7898914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfish160/pseuds/Wolfish160
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the Underground, Tova is usually able to avoid being caught by the Military Police with the help of Levi Ackerman. But this time she couldn't, as the body of a member of the Military Police lays dead on the ground, his blood dripping off her knife. In the end they sentence her to death by titans. As they drag her away from the only people she considers family, she tells herself she is going to fight. And fight she did.</p><p>Okami - Japanese word for "wolf"<br/>Wolf - 1. A wild carnivorous mammal of the dog family, living and hunting in packs<br/>2. Used in similes and metaphors to refer to a rapacious, ferocious, or voracious person or thing</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

_Damn it!_ The thug thought as she leaped over to the next roof. She should have listened to him, should have put faith in his words. She should have picked the option she was not going to regret.

"I shouldn't have been so selfish." Tova growled to herself. Shaking her head as she pushed her thoughts away into the air. There was no point in thinking about what she should have done. She can't change it.

_Clank._

Tova tumbled off the roof onto the ground in pain, as a hook from the Military Police's gear shot through her calf. As she fell, the hook was ripped out causing even more searing pain. Tova stood as fast as she could, pulling her knife out as she tried to balance herself.

The man that injured her leg stood in front of her, holding up one of his rectangular blades. Glancing at her knife, that seemed useless against his blades, he smirked. "Come on let's stop playing this game of chase and just surrender. Your going to lose either way."

Tova chuckles darkly, no amusement in her voice. "If I'm going to lose, I'm going to do it fighting." She glared at the man, raising her knife into position. This wasn't her first fight, defiantly wasn't her first time being injured during one, and it wasn't fixing to be her last.

Not letting the man respond, Tova charges forward, ignoring the throbbing pain in her calf. Which was easier then expected considering the hook penetrated all the way through her thick calf.

The man swings his blade at the thug but she dodges it, and swipes his hand. Blood seams through the cut and adrenaline pushes through Tova, making the pain be forgotten. He grits his teeth in anger and goes to get her again with his blade.

There's no way for Tova to dodge out of the blade's path, so she has to take the risk of blocking the larger blade. The two weapons make contact, both of their holders pressing them together rigidly.

Tova has to think of something quickly, this man is obviously stronger than her. But strength can not over power her agility. With only one option, the thug pulls the knife away quickly. Griping her knife tighter, she side steps so the blade ends up connecting with the ground. As the man tries to recover from the unexpected movements, Tova wastes no time.

Steal, blue eyes connect with the man as the thug's blade slices across his throat. The man's body goes limp and falls to the ground, blood pooling around his head. Tova's breathing becomes erotic as she stares at the body lying before her.

Blood is splattered across her face, crimson dripping from her knife. But the worst of it is the pure horror presented in those eyes of hers. This may not be the thug's first fight but it was the first time it ended in death. Frozen in spot, Tova doesn't notice the group of men surrounding her.

When her arms are jerked behind her, causing her knife to hit the ground, is when she comes back to reality. The thug tries to jerk out of whoever has her arms pinned, but they've already cuffed her.

As she is forced down on to her knees, a man approaches her. The man takes a hand full of her dark, messy hair and jerks her head up so she'll look at him. "Killing a member of the Military Police is punished by death." He sneers, eyes boring into hers.

Tova looks away from the man and catches a figure crouched on the roof above them. She knows who it is without seeing his face. Levi stares down at her with his blade raised waiting to attack the men around her. He has his index, and middle finger, along with his thumb spread apart. Farlan and Isabel must be with him, because he's presenting the 'prepare' hand signal.

Tova wants to smile knowing that no matter what she chooses, Levi will always be there to help her if her choices turn on her. But she doesn't smile, she doesn't deserve to be saved. She went against his judgment and killed a man in the process.

Tova looks straight into his dead eyes, something most people can't bring themselves to do, and wiggles her fingers to get Levi to look at her hands. Once she has his attention, she bends her thumb halfway and shoots her index finger up, telling the fellow thug no. Levi furrows his eyebrows more and sends her back the same signal, mentally telling the thug she's being ridiculous.

Suddenly, Tova's hair is yanked to the side and she glares at the man. "Don't look away from me, thug." She stays silent, waiting for the man to get on with it. "I don't believe a little execution will be punishable enough for your crimes." The man smirks at her, and dread seeps through Tova. "So I sentence you to death by titans."

Tova's eyes snap up to Levi who's getting ready to pounce as he holds up the 'prepare' signal but she catches his eyes one final time. She smiles at him and holds her fingers out again, and also gives him a look to as if to say, _I dare you to try and save me._ She knows Levi is not intimated by her but he has always respected her decisions.

Levi grits his teeth angrily but pulls back his blade,he then crosses his fingers and holds up his pinkie, saying stop. He closes his eyes and sighs before returning her stare. He nods at the thug and she nods back and turns back to men surrounding her.

"At least I'll get see the outside world before I die." Tova says finally and the man holding her hair throws her forward.

"Then get your ass up and moving, because I can't wait for you to be eaten." Tova painfully gets onto her feet and limps her way out of the alley with all the men around her. The thug glances one more time back at the roof top to see Levi with Farlan and Isabel next to him now. Her family.

Farlan sends her a sad smile while the young red head bursts into tears and hugs Farlan tightly. Tova closes her eyes at the sight of Isabel crying and turns away, gritting her teeth at the pain in her calf. With a sigh Tova opens her eyes and decides then and now that she will not die when she steps foot outside of the walls.

She is going to fight, and fight she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I promise it's will get more interesting! I will be posting updates and drawings of Humanities Okami on my Tumblr ( http://wolfish160.tumblr.com/ ) under the tag fic: humanities okami.


	2. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been five years since Tova Knight was stripped from her only family to be eaten by titans.

It was one of those moments were the force of gravity is redefined. A moment were you get the taste of freedom birds have as they overpower the push of reality. Tova had these moments every time she sailed past trees, her hair becoming more wild the faster she went. The boredom she had an hour ago is swept away as she flips, literally, through the air.

Tova didn’t have to worry about running out of gas, there would be plenty to collect at the end of the day. As sad as it was, collecting gas tanks off the bodies of very brave soldiers, she didn’t have a choice in the game of survival. A game that Tova has played since she was cased out. In return, Tova would kill yet to be spotted titans that were heading their way.

“Speaking of the devil.” She chuckled to herself as she spotted a titan a few meters ahead. Putting one of her blades into their holder, she pulls up her black mask to cover most of her face. As adrenaline began to travel through her bones, Tova brought that blade back out in the open and went in for the kill.

As she shot her cables into the trees surrounding the giant, it suddenly looked up. Tova didn’t have time to decipher what was distracting the titan, as she brought her blades up and sliced her way into its nape. At first Tova had no idea how to kill titans until she spied on one of the many Survey Corps missions.

There seemed to be a mission every month or two, she caught onto its pattern after seeing flares that showed their presence. At first the flares scared her, thinking it was the Military Police, but her curiosity got the best of her.

Tova grinned under her mask as the seven meter fell and steam began to fill the air. Now she had to move away from this area as quickly as she could before the Survey Corps come to investigate.

As she was about to move west, something huge caught her eye. After taking a double take, Tova stared up at the 15 meter titan standing before her. How could she have not seen it before? It shouldn’t have been that easy _not_ to see the greenish, blue eyed titan in front of her.

Tova snapped out of her thoughts as the titan began to reach out to grab her. What made this situation even stranger was the fact that the titan was moving slowly, like it was trying not to spook her. Ignoring the strangeness of the titan, Tova shot her cables high above the titan and zipped up so fast she was surprised she didn’t run out of gas.

Once she was above the titan, she turned herself around and shot her cables at the shoulders of the titan. Then she dived down, her blades held high as she closed her eyes to avoid getting blood in them.

Her blades hit something, but it wasn’t the flesh of the titan. Tova’s eyes snapped open to see her blades against another set of blades that were _protecting_ the titan. Then Tova met eyes with the owner of the blades and she felt as if time itself had stopped.

She would have recognized piercing gaze anywhere. Levi glared at Tova like she just killed his family. Tova has only seen Levi glare at someone like that if they were a threat to him or others.

As she tried to recover from the shock, Tova retracted her hooks and pulled her blades away as quick as she could, remembering how fast Levi was in the Underground. Pushing herself back by pushing off of his blades with her feet, Tova shot her hooks to tree behind her and swung herself onto one of its many limbs.

Tova then took in her surrounds, noticing that Levi wasn’t alone. She stared at all the familiar green cloaks of the Survey Corps. They all looked at her, paying no attention to the titan that had now turned in their direction with Levi standing on its shoulder.

“Captain Levi are you and Eren okay?” Someone shouted among the group and Tova gaze went over to Levi. _If Levi is here maybe Farlan and Isabel are too,_ she thought to herself as she began looking around the group of soldiers.

“There’s no point in looking for an escape, your trapped.” Tova was startled by the voice and held up her blade in the direction the voice came from. There stood a woman with a bright grin cased across her face. Tova glared at the woman, noticing her brown messy hair and goggles that was made to replace glasses.

Tova wanted to sneer at her but she sensed the woman was smart considering she was able to approach her without being noticed. The formal thug took a quick glance back towards Levi who was still perched on that titan’s shoulder. And it seemed like the man was talking to it?

“Oh! Don’t worry about that titan!” Tova looked at the woman like she was crazy. “That’s Eren, he’s humanities savor. He’s a human that can shift into a titan! Isn’t that so awesome?! I wish I could shift into a titan, I could do so many experiments!”

“Do you ever shut up, shitty glasses?” Levi now stands next to the woman with an annoyed look. Tova has to keep herself from running up and hugging the small man. Then Levi looks at her and she keeps eye contact with him. “Now, why don’t you tell us who you are.” The question doesn’t sound like a question at all, more of an order.

“You should know that already, Levi.” Tova says, her words are a little muffled by the cloth of her mask. The captain’s eyebrows furrow, and Tova has never been happier to see that angry expression.

Levi moves to pull down her mask and she lets him, a smile coming to her face as its yanked away. The shock in those grey eyes make Tova smile even more to the point that her teeth begin to show.

“Tova?” Levi says, not even trying to hide his shock. Instead of responding in words, Tova holds her hand up. She then halfway bends her thumb and holds up her index finger and pinkie, the hand signal for yes. Even though Tova has been outside the walls for years, she never forgot the hand signals Levi taught her.

“Tova Knight? The girl who got sentenced to death by titans for killing a member of the Military Police?” The woman that Levi called, “shitty glasses” says. Tova’s smile falters as the sickening fear of the Military Police finding out she wasn’t dead like they believed. The fear is so strong in her system that it makes her take a step back.

“Your safe Tova.” Tova’s eyes snap over Levi at the sound of his voice. She carefully takes in the emotions pouring from Levi’s eyes, happiness and guilt. Emotions she only ever saw when they had won a fight in the Underground but someone had got hurt in the process.

“No one is going to hurt you,” his eyes harden. “Not while I’m here, not again.” Her steal blue eyes widen at Levi’s words, knowing they had an unknown extra meaning to them. Tova nods, putting her blades in their rightful place.

“Now lets get to business.” A new voice says from behind her, and it takes everything in Tova not to unsheathe her blades. The voice is calm and stern, it makes her get goose bumps. With tense shoulders, Tova turns around to see the owner of the voice.

A very well built, blonde man towers over her with blue eyes that could chill you to the bone. Tova observes the man, noticing how he stands tall with authority. The sight of the man makes Tova wanted worship the ground he stands on. The sheer thought of that makes the formal thug grit her teeth with annoyance.

“There’s no need.” Levi’s voice breaks her train of thought. The man gazes at Levi before looking at Tova with a calm expression. “Tova is coming with us, with or without consent.” That makes Tova look away from the mysterious stranger.

“For what reason?” She says looking back and forth at Levi and the blonde.

“Your going to join the Survey Corps, just like we did.” Levi says as he catches Tova’s gaze. “And this time I’m not making a choice I’ll regret.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Please go check out my Tumblr to see Tova's character design! http://wolfish160.tumblr.com/post/149729206756/humanities-okami-tova-kight-please-go-read-on Tag: fic: humanities okami


	3. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being reunited with the man Tova trusts most, Levi Ackerman, she prepares to become a soldier among the Survey Corps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick warning, there's some slight Ereri in this chapter. Nothing big, just a slightly jealous Eren. I apologize if you do not find this ship interesting. But I will promise it won't be major in the plot, just something a little extra.

“We?” Tova whispers staring at Levi. He avoids making eye contact with her and just gazes to the right of him. “Levi what-” She is interrupted by sound of something quite large making contact with the ground.

Tova gazes at the ground to see the titan, who is apparently a human named Eren, sitting on the ground as if it was dead. Steam began to rise from the nape of the titan and for a moment Tova thought that it was dead. But soon a teenage boy emerged from the giant.

“The hell?” She mumbled to herself, almost not believing her eyes. Two Survey Corps members joined the teenager and helped him out of the titan.

“Looks like its time to head out.” Levi says, still not looking at Tova.

“Wait.”

“Your coming with us Tova, I’m not leaving this time.”

“Its not that, honestly I’d love more than anything to leave this place.” Tova says staring at Levi again. “Its just I want get a few things before we go.” This time Levi finally looks at her and nods.

“I’ll go with you-”

“Not alone.” The blonde man cuts Levi off.

“Tsk. Fine, I’ll take Eren with me. He’s in my custody after all.” Levi leaves no room for agreement as he shoots out his hooks, while telling Tova follow. She unsheathes her blades and also shoots out her own hooks. Gazing at the mysterious man one final time, she follows Levi down to the ground were he stands next to Eren.

Tova lands softly onto the grass under her boots as she points her blades down to keep from looking threatening. She retracts her hooks as she gazes at the three teenagers. Eren, the titan shiftier, gazes at Levi as the other two teens stare at Tova. The blonde haired one just gazed at Tova with awe, but the dark haired girl, she glared daggers at her.

“Eren, your coming with me. T-Okami needs to grab a few things before we head back.” Levi deadpans and it makes Eren stand up straighter.

“Yes sir!”

_Okami? Why did he stop himself from calling me by my name? Also why Okami, why wolf?_ Tova thinks to herself and then looks at her bloodied jacket. Faded fabric of the jacket, where the Wings of Freedom was once placed, is a black pigment designed into a threatening wolf.

“Alright, lead the way Okami.” Levi says as he turns towards her. Tova just nods as she glances at the teen who’s still glaring at her. Rolling her eyes directly at the teen, Tova takes off not bothering to see if Levi and Eren were following her.

*****

The three are quite as they follow Tova to her home. She wasn’t surprised Levi was not in a talking mood. For all she knows, he could be blaming himself for Tova being outside of the walls. Tova opens her mouth to ask him but Eren catches her eye.

“Don’t worry about him, the brat should know better than to go gossip about our conversations.” This makes Tova chuckle, something that she can’t put a date on for the last time she did it.

“You say that as if he’s a puppy, rather than a human who can shift into a fifteen meter titan.” Levi shrugs glancing at Eren, who looks embarrassed. “Oh how I’ve missed that expressionless face of yours.” This makes Eren look at Tova.

“How do you two know each other?” Tova and Levi look at each other before glancing back at Eren.

“We were friends in the Underground.” Levi states looking forward. Tova puts a hand over her heart with a hurt look in her features.

“I just got friend zoned.” She says jokingly as she makes her lip tremble. Levi looks at her with his usual bored expression. It makes Tova grin at him, before glancing at Eren. The teenager is glaring at his surroundings, as his eyes gleam with anger.

Tova looks back and forth between the two and smirks. Levi catches her smirk as the she gazes at Eren in the corner of her eye. “I don’t remember you being so dramatic, Okami.” The captain states bluntly and Tova smiles.

“Well since Eren here is not going to blab, why are you calling me Okami? Why aren’t you calling me by my name?” The humor in the air vanishes as Levi looks at his fellow Underground thug.

“Because I’m not letting you be taken, not again.” Levi says in the most stern voice Tova has ever heard coming from his mouth. “Tova, the Military Police will remember your name and someone in the Survey Corps may turn you in. That’s why you need to keep your name hidden. The only people that will know it will be Erwin, Hanji, Eren, and me.”

Tova nods as she realizes she forgot one the most important thing about Levi. He’s careful about everything, thinks over his words a million times before voicing them.

The formal thug can’t help but feel disappointed as the two of the names Levi mentioned were not the very familiar names she once knew. Deciding to ask Levi about this later, because this would be too personal to discus in front of Eren if _they_ were gone.

“But why Okami?” Levi looks away from Tova as Eren looks up at the two.

“We’ve know about you longer than you think. People began reporting that they saw a mysterious soldier in the forest, baring the mark of a wolf. At first we brushed it off but then we started realizing that blades and gas were missing from the corpses of fallen soldiers.” Tova looks down as shame starts to fill her gut as she remembers gathering supplies as she tried not to gag at the smell.

“We began sending special groups into the forest and every time someone spotted you, Okami, they would try to track you down but always lost you at the same damn tree.” Levi says and Tova chuckles.

“You mean this tree?” All three of them gaze up at tree. “This tree is my home.” She states with a small smile.

“How? I can’t count how many times we’ve inspected this tree but couldn’t find anything, even with our gear.” Eren exclaims, causing Tova to glance at the teen.

“You didn’t go high enough.” Is all she says as she sails up through the branches of the trees. Soon a dark, carved looking hole appears and Tova lands softly inside of tree. The hole its self is as tall as she is, her head barely skimming the surface.

*****

Once Tova grabbed a few important items and changed out their gas tanks, they made their way back. When they arrived, Levi stayed by Tova’s side like they were forcefully chained together. At first it didn’t bother her but it soon grabbed attention to the _men_ around her.

As she felt the stares of the male soldiers, it made her hug her stomach as the scars on her back began to itch. Levi quickly noticed Tova’s discomfort of all the stares on her. He opened his mouth to tell her to ignore them, but the look of fear in her eyes stops him.

Levi clears his throat to knock Tova out of her fear stricken state. Steal blue eyes jump from the staring men to the short man in front of her. Levi makes a motion for her to follow him and she does, releasing her stomach.

“We don’t have extra horses so we’ll have to share mine,” Levi glances back at her with a soft gaze. “Of course if your comfortable with that.”

Tova looks away as she realizes Levi must have seen the way she reacted to those men. Her scars began to itch again, as an image of a green, horned horse swims into her thoughts. Shaking her head, ignoring the iteration spreading across her lower back, she looks at Levi.

“Levi, it may have been five years, but the trust I feel around you hasn’t changed.” Levi lips begin to turn up but stop as the blonde man from before approaches.

“We’re heading out.” He states as his gaze moves to Tova. “I assume _Okami_ will be riding with you.”

“The shit doesn’t fall far from the horse.” The blunt reply from the raven haired man makes the man chuckle.

“Of course, Captain.”

“Commander.” And with that final reply from Levi, the man walks away to his horse. Tova can’t help but stare at the man as he walks away. Her gaze on the man is torn away as her hair begins to be tugged.

She snaps her head around to see a tall, black creature nibbling on her hair. With wide eyes, Tova carefully places her hand on the horse’s neck. It distracts the animal as she slowly pulls her hair away. Once Tova’s dark hair is safe and secure, she begins petting the horse’s neck softly.

“She usually only let’s the Captain pet her.” Eren’s voice brings Tova’s eyes away from the horse to him. He stands a careful distance next to the horse as he holds onto its’ reins.

“Well I should be allowed, she was the one nibbling on my hair after all.” Tova says, amusement sinking into her voice as her nerves begin to calm.

“On your horse Jaeger, we’re leaving.” Levi commands as he takes the reins from the teenager’s grasp.

“Yes Sir!” Eren quickly leaves as Levi climbs onto his horse. Tova looks behind her at the forest that she called home, before attempting to climb onto the horse.

When they begin to move, on instinct, Tova wraps her arms around Levi’s waist to keep herself steady. She quickly thinks about removing them but when Levi shows no sign of discomfort she pushes the thought aside. Instead she lays her forehead against his shoulder as she closes her eyes and falls into, for the first time in five years, a dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! This is, right now, one of my favorite chapters (idk why) so far. I hope to try and update monthly but I can't make any promises. Anyways, have a wonderful day/night my lovely readers!
> 
> Tumblr: http://wolfish160.tumblr.com/  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	4. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova is finally back in the safety of the walls after five dangerous years, and she finds out the terrible fate of the two other people she considered her family.

“The Survey Corps is back!”

“Were our taxes a waste again?”

“Who’s that girl on Captain Levi’s horse?”

“Is she dead?”

Tova’s blue eyes blink open to Levi’s tan jacket. Her eyebrows scrunch into confusion at all the shouting voices around her. Blinking again, Tova slowly rises off of Levi’s shoulder and looks around.

Large, grey stone is the first thing that catches Tova’s eyes. Then the civilization, and the shouting crowds of people pouring out of the buildings. “Walls.” she whispers as she gazes at the once familiar place she called home.

“About time you woke up, you get heavy after a while.” Levi retorts and it makes Tova smile slightly.

“Sorry, I haven’t slept that good in five years.” He glances back at her with a blank face, but sadness in his eyes.

“Captain who is this woman?” A man from the crowd shouts. Tova glances over at the man to see the people surrounding them are all looking a her. All the attention makes Tova’s nerves dance around in her stomach, causing her to tighten her grip on Levi’s waist.

“Ignore them,” Levi mumbles as his horse begins to trot. “Pull up you mask, there are some Military Police up ahead.” Hearing that name makes Tova’s hand begin to shake as she pulls up the dark cloth over her mouth and nose.

She keeps her head low as they pass through the noisy crowds, her hair covering up most of her face. She manages to stay calm for the most the travel through the walls, but a familiar voice has her shoulders tense.

“Commander Erwin Smith.” The gruffness of the voice makes those vary scars on her back itch. Tova carefully glances up to see _him_ addressing the blonde man Levi had called Commander. _So he’s Erwin, one of the few people who know my name._

“Commander Nile Dok.” Tova instantly presses her face against raven’s back, trembling. This reaction doesn’t go past Levi, as the girl behind him shakes. Levi could almost feel the fear coming off the girl as they came closer to Nile.

“Pretend to be asleep.” Levi mumbles, not looking back at her as they reach to where Nile stands with a couple of other members of the Military Police.

Tova follows Levi’s orders, and tries to be limp as possible, which is hard for all the nerves running through her body. Just as they are about to pass by Nile, he speaks up.

“Who is this?” Fear, fear so big Tova almost leaps off that horse and makes a run for it. But she doesn’t, keeping as limp as she can.

“Someone who has nothing to do with your Military Police, Nile.” The harsh retort has even Tova in surprise. Sure the shorter man isn’t the nicest person in the walls but being so disrespectful to the leader of the Military Police, that was something that would shock anyone.

Before the commander could reply, Levi trots away and continues his way. Tova just continues to lean into Levi as her eyes become heavy again and sleep takes over once again.

*****

_Chuckling men. Terrified, muffled screams. Unwanted pain and pleasure. Five seeping cuts of crimson. Five scars, five men._

*****

“Okami!” Tova startles awake, someone is pulling her arm. Blinking away the tiredness, she realizes she is leaning to the side of the horse. She looks up to see Levi holding onto her arm tightly, keeping her from slipping off.

As she is about to fix herself on the horse someone slides their arms under her arm pits. They gently pull her off of the horse and sit her on the ground. On instinct, Tova yanks herself away from them and turns around to glare at them.

Erwin stands there with a stern stare at Tova, but his eyes hold confusion. Tova lowers her glare but keeps a safe distance from the man. He had only been trying to help, but the nightmare Tova had woke from caused her to react in such a way.

Pulling her mask down so that it lays against her chest, Tova opens her mouth to speak. “...Sorry.” She mumbles awkwardly, not really sure how to speak to the man. Erwin stares at her for a moment and nods, accepting her apology for her behavior.

Luckily, Levi steps up next to Tova and the awkwardness begins to fade. “You alright,” Levi begins before coming closer. “Tova?” He whispers so only the three of them hear. Tova looks between the men nervously before finally speaking.

“I’m fine, I was just startled because I had woken up from a nightmare.” Levi touches the sleeve of her jacket as Erwin nods once again. The formal thug glances down at her sleeve and gives Levi a small smile.

Levi has always been awkward when it came to comforting someone. When it was strangers he ignored them. But when it was someone he cared about, he’d give them simple touches to show his care and comfort. Rarely did he give more than that, but that was okay. A simple touch was enough to make Tova feel better knowing he cared.

The blonde man clears his throat and both of them look up at the tall man. “I take it you’ll show Okami where she will be sleeping for the night.” Levi looks at him sharply, tugging on Tova’s sleeve once, and turns away towards the giant castle they had arrived to.

She glances at Erwin one more time, making instant eye contact. Staring for a moment, Tova looks away and goes to catch up with Levi. When she finally gets to Levi’s side, she glances again to see him gone. Tova can’t figure out why, but there’s something about that man that catches her attention.

*****

As the two walk through the hallways of the grey castle, Levi explains how Tova will be sharing a room with the rest of the girls in his squad. Sharing a room didn’t bother her, she’d shared a room with Isabel back in the Underground. As her thoughts lean towards her years as a thug, she finally asks the question she has want to ask since she saw Levi after five years.

“Levi, where is Farlon and Isabel?” The raven stops dead in his tracks, his hands tightening into fists.

“Their gone.” Tova almost doesn’t catch his words, doesn’t want to if she was being honest. A very familiar pain fills her to the brim as she stands there frozen in place. She should have know, Levi would never abandon them. They weren’t only her’s but also Levi’s family.

“How?” Tova whispers, tears blur the bottom of her vision. Levi turns around to face her, guilt painted across his face.

“It was our first expedition, the titans got them. And it was all my fault, if I didn’t go after Erwin it would have never happened-” The sound of a hand coming in contact with skin echoes through the empty hall.

Levi calmly places his hand on his now red cheek, rubbing the sensitive skin. Tova’s hand is still raised, her face wet with tears. Grey and blue eyes meet and familiarity shines in both. This isn’t first time this has happened.

“Don’t you dare utter those words again.” Tova finally speaks, her eyes not leaving Levi’s. “I don’t know why it happened, but I do know they wouldn’t blame you for it. It doesn’t matter what you could have done or shouldn’t have.” Levi drops his arm to his side, the redness in his cheek beginning to fade.

“It wasn’t, and never will be, your fault. It wasn’t your fault they died.” Levi opens his mouth to speak but Tova beats him to it. “And it wasn’t your fault I lived five years outside of the walls.” Whatever Levi was going to say is lost as he stares at Tova. A few minutes pass before Levi is able to respond to her words.

“Okay.” That simple word causes all the anger Tova had fade into nothing as she jumps onto Levi. Sobs fill the hallway, as the formal thug grips tightly to her only family left. Not knowing what to do, Levi just presses his forehead against her shoulder.

The awkward jester makes Tova smile through her tears. When Tova is finally able to gain control of her emotions, she lets go of Levi. Taking a step back, she wipes the salt off of her cheeks.

“I guess it’s just us now, _Black Panther_.”


	5. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova meets her four new roommates.

Eventually Tova and Levi reach the girls’ dorm after their little moment in the hallway. Levi knocks on the wooden door and waits, crossing his arms. Soon a small, blonde girl opens the door with a much taller, freckled girl behind her. Their eyes shift from Levi, to Tova and they stay there.

“Okami will be joining our squad, so it’s only right to have her sleep in your dorms. Please show her to the showers, and find her something to sleep in.” The raven explains before turning to Tova one final time. “I’ll see you in the morning, Okami.” The name sounds odd on his tongue, as if it was forced out.

“Sleep good, Levi.” The old, familiar phrase falls off Tova’s tongue before she can even register it. It makes Levi linger a little longer than he meant before he gently brushes past her, leaving Tova with these new strangers.

Her blue eyes watch Levi as he turns a corner and disappears from sight. Nervously she shifts her eyes to the two girls still standing in the doorway. Tova clears her throat awkwardly as she tucks some of her hair out of her face.

“Um...hey I’m Okami.” Tova scrunches her eyebrows slightly, _it’s going to be hard not trying to say my name_. The blonde girl makes eye contact with her and smiles.

“I’m Krista and this is Ymir.” The girl jesters to the girl behind her. Ymir just stares at Tova, pure boredom stricken across her face. Tova glances between the two and returns Krista’s smile.

“It’s nice to meet you Krista,” her eyes shift over to the freckled girl, “and you, Ymir.” Ymir rolls her eyes and swings her arm over Krista’s shoulder.

“Krista after we show this newbie around, lets go get married.” Tova eyes widen, not expect that statement. Krista shakes her head and nudges Ymir playfully.

“Ignore her.” Ymir just grins as she pulls the girl inside, Krista motioning for Tova to follow. Following the odd pair, Tova looks around the dorm. There are four bunk beds up against the walls, two of them untouched. There is also a chest at each end of the beds for clothes and personal items.

The two lead Tova to the end of the room where a door is present. Ymir opens it and reveals a bathroom with two shower stalls, toilets, and sinks, with one mirror hanging in between. Suddenly a plush towel is shoved into her arms and she looks up at Ymir.

“Take a shower, Krista will lay you some clothes outside of your stall.” She nods, gripping the towel with slight excitement. To Tova, it feels like she hasn’t had a proper bath in decades. The formal thug steps into the bathroom, but pauses and looks at Ymir again.

“Thank you.” Ymir seems a little surprised, obviously not used to the phrase. Nodding, the freckled girl shuts the door and Tova is now left alone. With a sigh, she walks up to one of the stalls and begins undressing.

Once she was nude, Tova steps into the stall, drawing the curtain shut behind her. Carefully, she turns the novel and water sprays out. Tova jumps out of the way of the water, afraid it would be cold like the lake water she would have to bathe in. Hesitantly, she reaches her hand out to touch the water. She smiles when the water dancing on her palm is warm.

Tova takes slow steps as she begins to submerge herself into the spraying water. Once she is fully dripping with water and her hair is soaked is when a grin breaks out over her face. Tova tangles her fingers in her hair as happy tears threaten to fall.

*****

As much as she didn’t want to, Tova finally got out of the shower. She found the clothes Krista left, where she left her dirty clothes that were now gone. Tova assumed the teen took them so they’d get a long deserved wash. After putting on the surprisingly fitting clothes on, she exits the bathroom.

She towels at her dripping hair as four pair of eyes look towards her. Krista smiles at her while Ymir gives her that same bored expression. Tova glances at the two newcomers and recognizes one of them. It’s the girl who was glaring at her while Levi was informing Eren on what they were going to do. And standing next to her was a brown haired girl with wide eyes.

“Took you long enough.” Ymir says bluntly and Tova rolls her eyes.

“You try not having a proper bath for five years.” Sarcasm drips from her mouth as she glances at the girl. Krista and the brown haired girl seem surprised by Tova’s words. Pushing her surprise away, Krista opens her mouth to speak.

“Okami, I’d like to meet the rest of us.” Tova nods looking at the two girls once again. “That is Sasha,” she points at the brown haired girl, “And that’s Mikasa.” The black haired girl slightly begins to glare at her again.

“If you think that glare is going to make me scared, you have another thing coming, Mikasa.” Tova finally snaps tired of this girl’s unnecessary glaring. Mikasa glares harder not liking Tova’s words.

“Oh! She’s only glaring because she’s really protective over Eren. And you kinda almost killed him when he was in his titan form.” Sasha explains and Tova’s annoyance created by Mikasa begins to die down.

“Sorry for that, but how was I supposed to know humans could turn into titans?” Mikasa just looks away, still not muttering a word. Suddenly a bell chimes and the girls turn toward the beds.

“Pick any of the empty bunks to be your bed. When that bell chimes us scouts need to get to bed.” Tova nods and ends up picking the one next to Mikasa and Sasha’s bed.

Once Tova is sat on her bed is when the candles are blown out and darkness consumes the room. Yawning, the tired girl lays down on the bed curling into the sheets.

Everything that has happened so far feels like a dream to her. From seeing Levi again, returning to the walls, finding out the truth of her old friends. None of it seems real, but it is. And if reality was nothing but a dream, then this is only the beginning of it.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it's a little boring and kinda a filler. But next chapter will be interesting, more Tova and Erwin scenes.   
> To see art of Humanties Okami please go to my Tumblr (wolfish160) and look under the tag fic: humanities okami! Also you can check out my Amino in the Attack on Titan community (wolfish160), I have a Tova Knight favorite where you can read up a little more on Tova. And lastly I have posted both on Tumblr and AoT Amino a drawn scene from chapter one, so please go check it out!


	6. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova begins her first day in the Survey Corps head quarters by running into the Commander himself and getting on Eren's good side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for non-ereri shippers! It's towards the end you can skip it until the last few paragraphs, but I would recommend reading it just for character relationship development (is that even a thing? it is now).

_“Come on Knight, stop struggling we all know you wanted this to happen.” That voice whispers into her ear, chills traveling up her spine._

_“No!” She screams into the gag, the cloth digging into the corners of her mouth. Then she feels the drag of cold metal across her back. She could feel the crimson seeping down her back as her screams were muffled by cloth._

*****

Tova jerks awake, ripping away the sheets as if they were the hands that had touched her in her dream. She takes in short breathes as she tries to register where she was at. Suddenly a pair of blue eyes come into view and her breathing begins to calm. Krista stood in front of her with wide and concerned eyes.

“Okami, are you alright?” The blonde girl asks as Ymir appears behind her. She has to look away from the girl for a moment as she tries to calm herself. Once she is calm and is able to speak words she turns back to Krista.

“Y-Yeah, I’m okay. It was just a nightmare, this isn’t anything new. I get them almost every night so for fare warning, don’t worry about them.” Her voice is a little shaky but she still sounds convincing, not that Tova was lying or anything.

Krista then nods in understanding as Ymir just stares at the older girl. “I hope they won’t bother you too much. It’s time to head to the mess hall, I put your clothes on top of your chest. There’s some new ones too since your others were ripped and bloody.” The small girl says and Tova gives her a small smile.

“Thank you Krista.” The blonde girl just smiles at that before looking back at Ymir.

“We’re going to head out, the mess hall is not that far from here. Just two rights and a left.” Ymir says as she throws her arm around Krista and leaves. Tova just sighs as she’s completely alone and gets out of the creaky bed.

Stretching her long limbs, Tova discovers the clothes Krista was talking about. On the left side of the chest was the new clothes, and on the right was her old ones, along with her harness. Tova decides to keep her black tank top, considering she’s only had it for a week and it was perfectly fine, and her mask.

She then began dressing herself, adjusting her harness, strapping on the leather skirt, and her boots. As Tova tied her mask around her wrist her eyes catch the familiar white and blue logo. She stares at the unworn Survey Corps jacket before picking it up and sliding it on.

She slips into the bathroom quickly while borrowing one of the girls brushes, hoping they won’t mind, before exiting the dorm. As she walked down the hallways, vaguely remembering Ymir’s directions. Tova’s thoughts begin wondering to the nightmare she had woken from.

Lost in thought, Tova suddenly collides into what feels like might be a wall. She steps back abruptly and looks up. There stands the tall blonde man, holding a stack of papers in his hands. Commander Erwin, looks slightly startled as he stares down at Tova but it doesn’t last long. Tova begins to panic a little, not entirely sure on what to do.

“I’m sorry, my mind was somewhere else and I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings.” Her dark hair falls into her face slightly but she doesn’t move. Too nervous on how the Commander will react.

“I should be the one apologizing, I also wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings. I had my eyes glued to this paperwork.” Erwin smiles slightly, and Tova’s shoulders relax, she hadn’t even noticed they were tense.

They fall into a silence that Tova can’t decide if it’s awkward or comfortable. Just as Tova tries to walk away, Erwin speaks up. “Are you heading to the mess hall?” She pauses and turns towards the man and nods. “Good, so am I.”

The man then begins walking and Tova walks with him, again not really sure what to do. But Erwin seems to decide for her. “Tova.” Her name rolls off his tongue in a way she doesn’t know how to describe.

“Yes?” She glances at him to see him already looking back at her.

“I wanted to thank you for saving us by killing oncoming titans. If it wasn’t for you, there would have been a smaller number of soldiers here.” Tova’s eyes widen as a slight blush comes to her face but she doesn’t look away like most girls.

“I felt like it was my way for repaying for the supplies I would collect off of the deceased.” She told the man honestly, her eyes not daring to leave his. Erwin stops walking as they have arrived at the doors of the mess hall. The two stare at keep other for a moment but are interrupted as the doors in front of them swing open.

Levi stands there, looking between the two with a boring gaze. “About time you made it here, I thought you had gotten lost.” Tova rolls her eyes teasingly at Levi.

“Did someone miss me?” She says in a voice of awe. A tone that had always bothered Levi in someway. He glares at Tova, knowing his glares don’t phase her.

“Tch, brat.”

“Brat? I’m twenty-three Levi, my brat years are over.” Tova retorts in a hearty tone as she smirks at Levi. The Commander chuckles and both of their eyes glance up to the man.

“I believe she has a point.” The raven rolls his eyes, looking back at Tova.

“You’ll always be a brat, even when your a hundred.” Tova rolls her eyes, trying to look annoyed but a grin breaks across her face. Levi’s lips twitch upwards but stop as he glances back at Erwin. She also glances at the man to see him also glancing back at her. Most of the time when men look at her she gets uncomfortable, but when his blue eyes look at her she feels safe like when she’s with Levi.

“Thanks for walking with me...” Tova trails off, not really sure what she is allowed to call the man.

“Erwin, but around my comrades call me Commander.”

“Okay, Erwin.” He smiles at her and she gives him a smile of her own. Suddenly, Tova’s stomach growls reminding her how hungry she is. A blush threatens to rise but she doesn’t let it.

“Levi, I’m gonna starve. Take me to the food.” Tova whines, clutching her stomach as if she was in pain. The raven, of course, rolls his eyes and walks into the mess hall. Tova quickly follows and groans, to annoy Levi, until her mouth is filled with food.

*****

Tova walks into the kitchen and Eren looks up from the counter. The girl was feeling bored and wouldn’t stop reminding Levi, until he told her to go clean the kitchen and left. She sends the teen a small smile, he just stares with a frown.

“Is there anything I can do?” The dark haired girl asks, shifting awkwardly. Eren glances at the sink and Tova’s eyes follow spotting the stack of dishes. She nods to the teen and strips out of her light, brown jacket. Laying it on top of a wooden table, she walks over to the sink turning on the water.

“I hope I’m not too rusty, I don’t feel like getting kicked in the ass by Levi.” Tova says with a chuckle, trying to get rid of some of the awkwardness. Eren lips twitch slightly but stop as he turns his back to her and continues to clean the counter. Tova sighs and shuts off the hot water once the sink it full. Pouring a generous amount of soup into the clear water, she gets to work.

She handles each dish with care, especially the tea cups and pot. Once every thing is spotless and laid across the drying rack, Tova looks over at Eren. The green/blue eyed kid is still working on that counter, making sure it’s up to Levi’s standards.

“Eren, could you do me a favor and make sure these are up to Levi’s standards before I put them away?” He meets her blue eyes and nods, leaving the counter for the first time since she had arrived. As he observes Tova’s work, his eyes widen in surprise.

“Wow, most people can’t do this on their first try.” Eren says in awe and Tova smiles.

“I used to live with Levi so this isn’t the first time.” At the mention of Levi, Eren’s eyes narrow and look away. This reaction had Tova thinking back to the jealous look on Eren’s face when Tova had joked about being friend zoned. The more she thinks about it, the more it makes sense.

“You like him, don’t you?” Tova asks and Eren’s face turns red as he avoids her stare. The teen tries to form words, but fails in the end. Tova grins at him and chuckles a little at the flustered boy.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. But I just want to let you know that you don’t have a reason to be jealous over me.” That catches the teens attention as he finally looks at Tova. “Levi is my family, and only that. We’ve never had a romantic type of relationship or feelings for each other.” That makes Eren smile slightly but his features seep into a look of guilt.

“I’m sorry Tova, I’ve been acting like an ass because I let my anger get the best of me.” The teen apologizes and Tova wraps her arm around his shoulders.

“Hey don’t worry about it.” She says as she move her hand to ruffle his hair gently. She then makes eye contact with the boy, the words that come out of her mouth hold no humor. “Listen, you’ll have to be patient with Levi. He’s not the most romantic or comforting type. He’s quite awkward when it comes to touching or talking about his feelings. So don’t hold it against him, that’s just the way he is.”

Eren nods understandingly and a smile returns to Tova’s face. The teen opens his mouth to speak but a sharp voice beats him to it. “Aren’t you two supposed to be cleaning?” Eren instantly jumps out of Tova’s arm and turns to Levi nervously.

“We are clean freak, I was letting Eren make sure these dishes were up to your standards is all.” Tova says and smirks at the nickname that Levi loves oh so much. Levi rolls his eyes and walks towards Tova and inspects the dishes himself.

“Tch, I’m surprised your not rusty.” Levi comments and Tova smiles.

“Eren thought the same.” He looks over at Eren who is staring at the floor.

“You two can be done, Eren send Jean here to put up the dishes.” Levi then turns towards Tova. “We need to go up to Erwin’s office to discuss things.” Eren leaves with a ‘yes sir’ and Tova just follows Levi out of the kitchen. For some reason nerves bubble up in her stomach at the thought of what they needed to discuss in the Commander’s office of all places.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I usually only post these when I am a chapter ahead in writing but decided to post it anyway while I take a break from writing chapter six. Also please leave some feedback, I'd would really love to hear about what you think about the story so far.
> 
> Tumblr: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	7. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova and Levi go to Erwin's office and she leaves with Hanji dread filling her to the brim.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY EARLY HALLOWEEN MY LOVELY READERS!

When they entered Erwin’s office, Tova couldn’t help but shiver slightly. It was colder in the office than it had been in the kitchen. That’s when the dark haired girl realized she had left her jacket in there. It was only her first day of having it and she already forgot it.

Sighing to her self, Tova takes a seat in one of the two chairs in front of the blonde’s desk. Levi soon joins her side, sitting on the arm of the chair next to her while crossing his arms. Looking up, her eyes meet those bright blue ones before looking away casually.

“What do we need to discuss?” Tova asks glancing at both of the men. Levi turns to her, eyes meeting instantly out of habit.

“Since we can’t let the Military Police know your alive, we have to come up with a background story for _Okami_.” Levi explains, and she nods slowly. For some reason she can’t shake the way Levi said Okami, like it was nothing but a title. Well that is what it is, for now at least. Tova just felt that it would mean something more in the future.

“Do you have any ideas? I haven’t been here for five years so I don’t have a clue for how someone could be outside of the walls without being thrown out for a crime.” Levi looks over to Erwin.

“Three months after you were arrested and kicked out, the wall was breached by a sixty meter titan.” Tova wants to wince when Erwin mention her arrest, yes it was three months before but she wasn’t kicked out immediately. Shaking away the thoughts of why she wasn’t immediately off to her death when she was arrested, she waited for Erwin to continue.

“So I made up the story that during the breach of the wall, Okami ran outside of the walls once all the titans were in. Okami had thought she could wait outside until someone came to save her. But that didn’t happened and she ended up living out there for five years.” He finished and Tova looked out the window behind Erwin, thinking it over. Again, Okami was being used strictly as a title. Tova couldn’t quiet understand why it made her feel so vexing. She decided just to ignore it and turns back to the silent men. They were both staring at her, awaiting her opinion of _Okami’s_ story.

“Sounds good to me.” Tova says with a small smile. Erwin returns her smile as Levi nods, looking away.

“We’ll also have to go over documents, which Hanji has not yet given me.” Erwin says glancing over at Levi. He rolls his gray eyes and stands with sigh.

“I’ll go find shit glasses, just wait here.” Tova nods but calls out to Levi before he exits the room.

“Can you grab my jacket from kitchen?” She asks with an innocent smile when Levi turns to glare at her.

“If you were just an ordinary cadet, you would have been slapped.” With that Levi leaves, shutting the door behind him as Tova chuckles to herself. She then turns to that blue, piercing gaze of Erwin Smith.

“Do mind if I do paperwork while we wait?” He asks politely and she shakes her head no. He gives Tova another small smile as he looks down and begins ruffling through the stacks of black and white.

As they sit there in silence, Tova falls into one her habits. Often when she would get bored while outside of the walls, she would move her fingers and hands in odd ways. She never knew why she did it, but it seemed to calm and kept her sane.

But after ten minutes, her fingers became tired. She sighed, her gaze shifting around the room before it stopped on a pencil laying on the desk not being used. An itch to draw began to surface as she nervously glanced at the Commander. Swallowing thickly, Tova cleared her throat.

“Um, Erwin do mind if I borrow a blank piece of paper and a pencil?” The older man looks up from his papers while raising his thick eyebrows. Tova nervously glances at the bookcase, cursing herself for it too. “And maybe a book?”

“Sure, go ahead.” Erwin’s voice held no irritation or anger. Letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, Tova stands and quickly grabs a book from the case. Erwin then hands her a white sheet and a pencil.

“Thanks.” Tova says with a smile, which he returns before looking back down at his desk. She then raises her legs up while shuffling further into the seat, before resting the heels of her feet on the chair. Her knees are almost to her chest, but she feels content. When she brings the pencil up to the paper is when her creativity comes out and attacks, swallowing her whole.

*****

At least thirty minutes has passed since Levi left to go find Hanji. And in that time Tova was able to draw a sketch of someone swinging around with 3D maneuver gear. The person doesn’t really have a recognizable face but they are in the Survey Corps, considering the logo of two wings is presented on the jacket.

Suddenly, the door is slammed open causing Tova to jump out of her drawing state. Looking over her shoulder, she finds a pair of brown eyes already staring back at her. Before Tova can react, the paper she was drawing on is snatched away. Hanji gasps in excitement as she gazes at the drawing in awe. A part of Tova wants to be embarrassed about the drawing but she doesn’t let herself. Instead she turns over to Levi who looks more annoyed than usual, holding her jacket.

“Wah! This is so good, who would’ve known you could draw so good!” The brown haired women exclaims showing the paper to everyone. Levi doesn’t seem surprised considering he’s known about her creativity since the two had met back in the Underground.

Now as for Erwin, it seems the man can’t take his eyes off of the drawing. His gaze holds look of interest and awe. This makes Tova’s face warm up and she can’t understand why. “Who is it?” Hanji asks as she hands Tova back her drawing. She just shrugs as she lets her feet fall back onto the floor.

With that, they begin going over the documents. After about ten minutes of discussing, Erwin explains the last thing that will need to happen. “Now Tova, you’ll have to get a full body exam by Hanji to make sure your fully healthy.” This makes her shoulders stiffen and it doesn’t go unnoticed by any. Tova’s mind drifts to the scars on her back and the reasons for them being there.

“J-Just Hanji right? No men.” Tova can’t contain the stutter in her voice. She peeks a glance at Levi who looks confused and irritated. By the look the raven gives her tells Tova that he knows she is hiding something. Looking away, she catches Erwin nodding with a frown, concern in his features.

“Yup, just me. Now lets go to get it over with.” Hanji says trying to clear up the tension in the room. Tova nods standing up, grabbing her jacket from Levi in the process. She avoids his gaze, following Hanji outside without another word.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Next chapter you finally learn some of Tova's secrets! And also some of the chapter is in Levi's pov!  
> Tumblr: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	8. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova's secret about the scars on her back is revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter you'll have some of it in Levi's pov! And also a warning for anyone who is sensitive of rape and harassment.

**Levi**

His eyes lingered on her as she left, making an effort to not look at him. That just makes his irritation grow as the door closes and it’s just him and the blonde. His gaze moves away from the door and to the paper lying on the chair she had been sitting in.

“What is she hiding?” Levi whispers to himself, not caring if Erwin heard him or not. His mind was too busy on the subject of the formal thug. Tova has never really hidden anything from him, nothing that would affect them.

“I’ve noticed that she has a fear of being around men.” Erwin speaks up, causing the raven to look in his direction. Levi nods slowly in agreement, he had also noticed this fear.

“Tova has always been wary of men,” Those gray eyes darken. “The men in the Underground were disgusting bastards. Would take any chance they could to harass some girl. Tova had many encounters but she was stronger and didn’t let fear get to her.” Levi’s eyebrows scrunch in confusion. “That being said, this fear for men has never been a problem until now.”

“It had to have happened before she was throw out of the walls.” Erwin confirms as they finally make eye contact. Just by the look in his blue eyes tells Levi exactly what he’s thinking. The raven of course doesn’t want to believe it, but his gut says different.

“The Military Police.” Levi has to force the words out, disgust is heard in every word. The Commander nods sadly, hoping that he himself is wrong. But that’s the thing about the man, he’s rarely wrong about anything.

*****

**Tova**

Tova adjusts the straps of her harness nervously. Hanji had just finished the body exam and was going over all the information she gathered, while Tova redressed herself. The whole exam didn’t bother her that much but when it came to the scars on her back and her lower regions was when she got uncomfortable. Unfortunately, it didn’t go past Hanji as she was mostly quiet when she could see the discomfort in Tova’s blue eyes.

So now, Tova waited for Hanji to return as she fiddled with the black cloth around her wrist. She can’t help but worry that Hanji will ask her about the scars and her messed up genitals. Tova still doesn’t want accept it. Even though she has struggled with this for the past five years, she still can’t seem to accept it. She can’t accept that members of the Military Police-

“Tova, I need to ask you something.” Tova’s hands curl into fists as Hanji walks in. “And before I ask you, I want you to know that you can trust me.” All she can do is nod and waits for Hanji to say the _word_. Hanji seems to hesitate for a moment, clearly hoping that she didn’t need to ask this question.

“Were you...raped?” There it was, that one word Tova hated most, _rape_. And it was true, she had been raped by the same five men over and over again. Each one left their mark on her back on the last day she was in that hell. Tears threatened to fall as Tova looked at Hanji for the first time since she came back.

“...y-yes.” Those salt filled tears began to spill out of her eyes, streaking her face. “F-Five. There were five m-men, each left their mark on my b-back so I would always r-remember what they d-did.” Her voice cracked over and over again as sobs raked out of her body.

As each wave of tears came down her face the more Tova sank to the floor until she finally landed on the surface. And Hanji followed her down, and clutched Tova’s shoulders, bringing her into her warmth. The dark haired girl welcomed it, as she finally collapsed into it.

*****

**Five years ago...Wall Sina, Prison Cell**

_She sat there on the cold, concrete floor of her cell. Her tears had finally dried, she accepted she won’t see them again. She won’t see Isabel’s bright eyes filled with determination. She won’t be able to feel Farlan’s warm hugs and smiles. And she won’t be able to feel the sting of Levi’s knife on her skin while they trained._

_“I’m going to miss you Black Panther.” Tova sighs at the nickname she had given Levi when they first met. Tova’s father had always told her stories about animals that could almost be as dangerous at titans. She had always favored the wolf since she was a child._

_But when meeting Levi, he refused to tell her, a stranger, his name. So she settled on Black Panther because of his sleek, black hair and the way carried himself, cat like. It took over a month of earning his trust before Levi had finally told her his name. And then it took her another month for her to get used to calling him Levi and not Black Panther._

_Tova’s thoughts are interrupted as someone bangs something against the bars of her cell. Her blue eyes turn to glare at Nile Dok. He glared back at her for a moment before his cracked lips turned up into a smirk. Her glare hardens at that with disgust._

_“Don’t look at me like that sweetheart, we just came down here to have a good time.” When Nile’s voice spoke the word we, four other men appear behind him, all wearing similar smirks on their faces. Tova recognized their intentions instantly, she wasn’t stupid, they were the same looks men in the Underground would give her._

_“Don’t even think about it.” She growled, standing up, her glare unwavering. That makes all of them chuckle, those disgusting smirks widening. Without responding, Nile pulled out a set of keys and unlocked her cell. Tova ignored her leg as it stung in pain of the new weight, putting her focus on the men entering her cell._

_A man with blonde hair went up to her first, she threw a punch. A man with brown hair caught her wrist, bringing it behind her back. Tova was shocked that she hadn’t noticed the man before. In her shock, the blonde grabs her other wrist and they cuff them behind her back._

_Saying she struggled was an understatement. She kicked, jumped, and screamed until she was shoved into the wall behind her roughly. That’s when Nile came into view, only a hand length away from her face. His breathe smelled of smoke. Tova didn’t dare take her eyes off him as his eyes traveled across her body. She felt sick._

_Then he pressed his filthy hand against her breast. Tova jerked wildly, like she was a mad animal minus the growling. They held her down firmly, she gritted her teeth in anger. “Don’t touch me you pig!” She growled, that earned her a slap across the face._

_At the sting on her face, for the first time since these men came down to harass her, she felt fear. Fear so big, that tears began to blur her vision. She could handle one or two men, but not five well trained soldiers. A tear escapes and Nile moves to wipe it away. Of course Tova tries to jerk her head away but he grips her chin tightly._

_“Oh sweetheart, the fun hasn’t even begun. It’s going to be so amazing that your gonna wish you were being devoured by titans instead.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave me some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram: @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	9. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova finally tells Levi what she has been hiding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!

It was a while before Tova was able to collect herself and pull away from Hanji’s comfort. She wasn’t able to collect all of herself of course, but it was enough for now. Hanji has been silent since Tova told her the secret of her scars. But of course that wouldn’t last forever.

“I know you don’t want to think about this any more, but you’ll have to tell Levi and Erwin.” Hanji begins, Tova eyes snap up to hers in an instant. “I have to report everything from your body exam, scars and all. I’m sorry, you didn’t deserve any of this.”

“How would you know? You’ve only know me for two days.” Tova snapped, regretting it instantly. All of her emotions were an aftermath of a wagon wreck. Bits and pieces scattered every where, not knowing what piece goes where. Tova shakes her head, closing her eyes. “I’m sorry Hanji, my emotions are on an over load.”

The messy haired woman smiles, accepting her apology. “That’s understandable. So how do you want to tell them?” Tova opens her eyes, and looks at Hanji.

“I want you to take the reports to them, alone, and wait for them both to read over them. Once they have, I know they’ll have questions.” The dark haired girl swallows hard. “Tell them if they want their questions answered, to come to the kitchen. I’ll be there, making tea. You can stay if you want Hanji, I don’t mind. You’ve already seen the side of me that I’ve circled my life around hiding.” She finishes, waiting for Hanji’s response.

“Okay, I’ll do exactly that.” With that, both of them rise up, off the floor. The woman in glasses, gathers her stuff and heads for the door. But she is ever so slightly stopped by Tova’s voice.

“Thank you, Hanji.” Tova makes contact with brown eyes that seem to smile at her. Hanji nods at her, a smile visibly on her face. She then leaves, and Tova makes her way to kitchen, her mind buzzing.

*****

**Five years ago...Wall Sina, Prison Cell**

_She had never been so happy for the sound of her cell door locking as they left. Her dark hair has spread messily across her body. It helped cover her naked chest as she sat in a ball in the corner. Hugging herself tightly as she sobbed away the pain she just went through._

_Tova didn’t understand why they did it. How could something to vile be pleasurable to them? How could taking something and abusing it be exciting? And why did it feel like she was weak for not being able to stop them?_

_There were five of them, way too many for her to handle at once. They were well trained soldiers in the military, nobody could beat one with out practice. Let alone five of them. Tova kept repeating this to herself but it didn’t help. She still felt disgusted, afraid, and weak. And those feelings would stay with her until she realized she wasn’t the one at fault._

*****

It was thirty minutes of Tova being in the kitchen before the door was opened again. In that time, Tova was able to already have a few sips of tea to help her calm her mind. Her blue eyes only glanced up to make sure it was who she had expected. And it was, there stood Levi, Erwin, and Hanji, who was closing the door behind them.

Looking away, Tova turned her back towards them. She carefully picks up the hot tea pot and three cups, and places the in the middle of the preparation table. After that, she calmly looks at Levi and takes in his emotions. His gray eyes contain worry and anger. Tova thinks about how to start but all she can do is mumble his name. “...Levi.”

“Show them to me.” Is all he says, his eyes not leaving hers. He left no room for argument as Tova shed her jacket. She then unbuckles the strap across her chest and lets the top part of the harness slide down her shoulders. Turning her back to them once again, pulling her tank top up. Tova can feel their eyes boring into the five jagged scars across her back. Each one was inflicted by a knife.

“On the last day they had me there they did this. Took a knife and cut deep enough to leave a scar so I would remember what they did to me.” She explains as she lets her tank top fall back over skin and fixes her harness. “There was five of them, each of they members of the military police.” She then turns to face them, Levi who had clenched fists. Then there was Erwin who’s face was purposely blank, arms crossed against his chest. “Each one of them r-raped me.” Tova has to choke back tears.

There’s a loud bang, it makes Tova jump causing tears to brim her eyes. “Damn it!” Levi growls, pressing his fists against the table he hit. “If I would have just ignored your wishes to not rescue you, this wouldn’t have happened.” He adds, rage in each word.

“Levi, I dont-”

“No Tova, you should blame me! You didn’t deserve any of this.” Levi now stands in front of her. Tova just shakes her head, not caring that tears streak her face.

“I may have not deserved being raped, but I deserved being kicked out of the walls.” She argues back, clenching her teeth when she finishes. Instead of teeth, Levi clenches his fists in anger. His eyes hold a deadly look but it’s not meant for her.

“No you didn’t Tova! You did nothing wrong-”

“I KILLED A MAN LEVI!”

Never in her life time has Tova ever raised her voice at Levi, but time changes people. Five years of only having the company of titans, changed Tova. A long silence fills the room. Levi staring at her, not even bothering to hide his surprise in his features. Hanji also has a look of surprise. Now as for Erwin, his once crossed arms are limp at his side as he gazes at Tova with astonishment. A look she didn’t expect from the commander. She doesn’t get chance to dwell on it as Levi speaks once again.

“I’ve killed a man too,” He sighs, “more than you can count.”

“That’s how you were raised Levi. To survive you had to kill.” Tova states calmly, not wishing to raise her voice again. “I wasn’t.”

A silence fills the room once again but this time it’s not drenched in tension. It’s a silence full of sadness and realization as Levi gently grips Tova’s forearm. She looks down at the fingers softly, wined around her arm. Levi slowly glides his thumb over her skin in comfort.

A pair of arms wrap around her shoulders, squeezing them tightly. Tova glances up only to see a mound of messy, brown hair pressed against her shoulder. More tears threaten to fall at the sight and it makes Levi’s thumb drag longer across Tova’s skin.

Suddenly, a shadow looms over her and a hand cups the back of her head. Tova gazes up at Erwin in shock as he brings her face into his chest. Her lip trembles as a sob is on the breach of roaring out of her. Levi know grips her arm with both of his hands, both thumbs rubbing calming circles. But as Erwin’s hand began stroking her hair, the sob broke loose from its cage.

Tova brought up her free hand and griped the front of the Commander’s shirt as she sobbed into it. This causes his strokes to be even gentler as the girl soaked his shirt. Hanji and Levi also reacted to her sudden burst of tears. Hanji griped Tova’s shoulders tighter, while as Levi seemed to hug her arm, pressing a soft kiss to her hand.

They stay like this for what seems like hours, none of them dared to move away from the grieving girl. Tova was eventually able to gather apart of her self as she open her eyes. With red, puffy eyes and trembling lips, Tova was able to speak two words before letting tears fall again.

_“Thank you.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please leave me some feedback, it would really make my day!
> 
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160   
> Amino/Tumblr: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	10. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova meets the 104th squad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to have next chapter on Christmas!

That morning she woke up earlier than the day before. Tova opened her eyes slowly, letting them adjust to the lighting. As she waits away the sleepiness, she realizes something. For the first time in five years, she didn’t have nightmare. She finally got a night long rest that she has been craving for. Tova’s lips curl up slightly not being able to help it. Who knew that telling her secret would let her mind be at ease for a night.

She spots a figure out of the corner of her eye. Tova turns her head towards Mikasa, who is fastening the last of her harness. The black haired girl seemed to notice her gaze as she begins gazing back a Tova with a hard stare. But Tova just raises her eyebrows with a smirk, something that often irritated Levi. Mikasa’s gaze hardens into a glare. Tova chuckles, drawing everyone’s eyes to look at the two.

“Listen if Levi, sorry _Captain Levi’s_ glare doesn’t intimidate me, then yours sure as hell won’t either.” Tova decides to sit up as Mikasa takes in her words, face expressionless. But Tova can see the surprise in her eyes. “And also if I recall, your fifteen and I’m twenty-three,” her voice lowers, her smirk gone. “So doesn’t that mean you should show me a little respect?”

Pure silence filled with tension surrounds the room. Tova stands up from her bed, stretching her limbs, with her eyes still on the teen’s. After a moment of staring, Tova gazes at the other girls. And the expressions on their face make Tova break her facade. A howl of laughter bounces off the walls, making all the girls jump, even Mikasa.

“Your faces were priceless!” Tova cackles, pointing a finger at them. She lets out a few more chuckles before finally being able to control her laughter. Letting out a content sigh, she turns back to Mikasa with a smile. “Hey Mikasa, that was a joke. I don’t give two shits if you respect me or not. Honestly you all are probably more mature than me. But seriously stop glaring at me for no reason, okay?”

“Okay.” Mikasa says bored, slipping on her jacket before leaving. Tova smile widens and turns to the other girls. Sasha and Krista look at you in awe while Ymir just looks bored, like usual. Tova just winks at them before slipping into the bathroom.

*****

When Tova arrives to the mess hall, there’s no Commander by her side and no Levi in sight. She just shrugs, getting her a tray of food and sits down at an empty table. Even though Tova has been craving human interaction, she doesn’t know anybody here. And also she’d like to have a peaceful meal and not an awkward one.

Tova bites into her bread, chewing, as someone’s tray is dropped next to her’s. Blue eyes gaze up at the invader of her peaceful breakfast. The _“invader”_ was a teenage boy with a two toned undercut. He smirked at Tova with his rather long face. The smug smirk he holds tells her he’s expecting for Tova to fawn over him. But all she does is blink at him before returning to her bread, chewing out another bite.

Tova doesn’t have to see to know the boy’s face fell as she turned away. When a snicker rises in her throat another tray is set down, but in front of her. Looking up she meets the teal eyes of Eren. She smiles at him, and he returns it. “Morning, Eren.” Tova mumbles through her mouthful of bread, covering her mouth in the process.

“You too, Okami.” He replies sitting down, shoveling food into his mouth. To her right, the one boy scoffs finally sitting down. Eren shoots him a look, “What’s your problem Horseface?” That snicker she thought she’d be able to keep down, flies from her lips. Horseface, the long face probably brought along that nickname.

“Fuck off, Jaeger.” He grumbles as he also shovels food into his mouth. Tova watches as Eren rolls his eyes, she grins.

“Awe, he’s just down because I rejected him without speaking a word.” This makes the brown haired teen snicker through his mouth full food. But the other teenager sends both of them glares. When Eren and Tova settle down, she turns to the glaring teen. “What’s your name, two toned?”

“Jean.” He grumbles, not liking her nickname one bit.

“Hmm...I think I’ll stick to two toned.”

“Fuck you.”

“You wish.”

Laughter erupts around Tova, following with a scoff from Jean. She hadn’t noticed the group that formed around her while bickering with Jean. She recognized her roommates but the four other teenage boys were new. When the laughter died down the group began to sit down. Mikasa surprisingly sat next to her, no glare.

“Mikasa.” Tova greeted with a smile.

“Okami.” Her voice neutral, but it was better than nothing.

“Okami? What kind of name is that?” A male voice speaks up. Tova looks over to a teenager that was practicality bald.

“And what kind of hair cut is that?” She retorts, snickers rise through the group again. The boy’s eyes widen in embarrassment, face also becoming red. “Sorry. Anyways what’s your four’s names?”

“Connie.” The teen I teased says.

“I’m Reiner” A blonde, also fucking huge, teen says.

“B-Bertolt.” A rather tall teen with dark hair says. He seemed to be rather awkward and sweaty.

"Armin." Another blonde teen says, but he was a lot smaller than the other blonde. Tova observed him for a few seconds, he may not be strong but that brain of his seems to be.

“Well I’m Okami, don’t ask about the name please, and be prepared I will tease you about a lot of things. So in conclusion, don’t get offended.” There’s a few chuckles after that but everyone soon dives into their food. Tova just listens, finding the group of teens amusing.

But suddenly everyone jolts up saying, “Captain Levi, sir!” Tova blinks at the group holding the same pose. She turns to see Levi behind her, and she grins.

“Hope I’m not in trouble for not greeting you like that Black Panther.” Levi just rolls his eyes at the nickname, before nodding to the group. They sit down but don’t talk, instead they stare at Tova and Levi.

“Erwin needs us to finish off the last of those documents.” Levi states flatly, Tova groans.

“I thought we were done.” She grumbles standing up from the table. Before she walks off with Levi she turns back to the table. “Could one of you...” She trails off pointing to her empty tray. They nod and she smiles before leaving with Levi.

The walk to Erwin’s office was filled with Tova’s day so far. She tells Levi about the incident with Mikasa causing him to smirk. By the time they reach the door she had just told him what she said to Connie. Levi doesn’t bother knocking as he walks in with Tova still chattering away. But it is stopped when Levi shoves her behind him with a tight grip on her arm.

“Levi what are you-” She stops mid sentence as she sees the cause. There stands next to Erwin’s desk is the man of her nightmares.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	11. Chapter Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova finally realizes something about Commander Erwin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I was going to post this on Christmas but changed my mind and decided to post it early!

**Five years ago...Wall Sina, Prison Cell**

_She sat against the wooden headboard, curled up into a ball. The dusty sheets was all she had to cover herself. They shredded her clothes, and didn’t bother to bring new ones. Saying that the clothes would get in way of her “punishments”._

_At moments like this, she’d wish that she would have let her hair grow out. Her black hair only reached her jaw. If it was longer, she’d be able to have a little more warmth in this void prison. The littlest of things could do a lot. She then promised herself to never cut it. It’d help her survive outside of the walls. That is if she ever makes it there._

_Her thoughts are broken as the metal door screeches open. On reflex, she flinches away from the noise. Attempting to curl even more into a ball with the sheets as foot steps come her way. A tear breaks loose as they stop in front of her._

_The sheet is ripped away, coldness of the cell hitting her bare body. The chains connecting to the cuffs around her wrist rattle, as she tries to get away. She finds no such luck, his ruff hands grip onto her. He forces her down onto her stomach against the bed. He runs a hand up the back of her thigh, she sobs._

_“P-Please! Don’t! A-Anything b-but this-s.” He unbuckles his belt, then positions himself._

_He didn’t listen. He never did. Even when she said things that would break his facade._

_“W-What about your wife?” He didn’t even pause, thrusting. She let out another cry._

_“Your c-children! What about-t them?” Still nothing, so she gave up but didn’t stop her screams of protest. She wanted her screams to haunt his dreams. Wanted to make sure he never forgot her pain. Pain that he not only caused her, but also to his so called family._

*****

Nile Dok.

The Commander of the Military police. The Commander who ordered four of his other men to rape her as punishment for her crimes. The Commander who raped a eighteen year old girl when he had a wife and three kids. The Commander who was a sad excuse for a human being.

That Commander stood right in front of that said girl.

Tova couldn’t move, frozen in spot behind Levi as Nile gazed at the two. His eyes stayed on her for a while before shifting back to Erwin. He didn’t seem to recognize her. Thank the walls she let her hair grow out.

“Is this Okami?” Nile asked, Erwin didn’t bat an eyelash at him.

“Yes. Now that you have seen her you can leave.” Tova has never heard such an emotionless tone from Erwin.

“I believe my words were, ‘I’d like to meet this Okami’ not see.” The man shot back. Tova glanced at Levi, his fist were in balls.

“And I do believe that I rejected your request, Commander Dok.” That’s when Erwin stood up from his desk, staring hard at the man. “It’s time for you to leave.”

Nile sighs before making his way to the door. Tova steps to the side, trying not to look suspicious with Levi following her lead. She can feel his stare on her as he walks past them. For a split second she thinks she’s safe until he whispers into her ear.

“It was good seeing you, Tova.” Fear broke out across her face. Nile lifted up the back of her shirt, tracing the scars that lie there. It felt like she was back in that cellar. She couldn’t move, all the words that formed in her throat wouldn’t escape. So she did the only she could think of, hand signals. Slowly she connect her middle finger and thumb together in a circle, then let the rest of her fingers stand straight up. Levi’s eyes instantly darted his eyes to her hand, recognizing the signal for help.

Levi shoved her away, the lingering fingers finally off her back. She stumbles into Erwin, eyes filling with tears. Tova didn’t look behind her, not even when Nile let out a grunt of pain.

“Levi.” Erwin’s voice made even silence get quieter.

“No Erwin, he touched her.”

“Levi, let him go. I know you want to hurt him, I do to believe me. But he’s the Commander of the Military Police, who knows what happen to you if you beat him to death.” There’s a long silence, Tova still leans into Erwin as tears slowly slide down her face.

“Fine, but if you ever lay a hand on her again I’m defiantly going to make you feel the pain you caused her five years ago.” All she hears is a grunt and loud foot steps going down the hallway. As she listens to the fading thump of shoes against concrete, Erwin lays his hands on her shoulders.

“Don’t.” Tova whimpers, his hands jump away as if they touched fire. She didn’t want to be touched, the thought made her want to curl up into a ball in the corner. But she wanted to touch something warm, and full of comfort. She didn’t know why it was Erwin who she wanted to touch and not someone like Levi.

Tova hadn’t really thought about it until now. She felt safe around Erwin since the beginning and she didn’t understand why. She had only known the man for three days. It was just something about the blonde man that made her feel protected. Maybe it was his status as Commander or his large build. As much as she wanted to figure out this mysterious feeling, she couldn’t dwell on it. Tova had much bigger problems now.

“What’s going to happen now?” Tova speaks up, drawing both of the men’s attention.

“Don’t worry, Erwin always has a plan up his sleeve.” And she had no doubt that he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave feedback it really makes my day!   
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova finds her way onto the roof, a roof Levi knows very well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear this is one of the most heartbreaking chapters I've wrote so far. Also Happy New Year!

Tova sat on the roof of the Survey Corps base, enjoying the cool night air. She gazed up at the stars as her mind drifted to the events that had taken place that day. After the incident in Erwin’s office, Tova left as soon as her sobbing stopped. Those damn documents could wait. Levi tried to stop her by calling out to her, but she ignored him. Without knowing what to do, Tova explored the castle and that’s how she ended up her. She had gone down when the lunch bell rang. The teenagers from breakfast had tried to get her to sit with them but she ignored them too. She once again climbed the stairs to the roof with her lunch in hand, she hasn’t left again.

Suddenly, Tova let out a sigh as she felt someones eyes on her, and she had a pretty good idea who’s eyes it was. “I’m not going back to that office.” She spoke with bitterness in her voice.

“I didn’t come here to take you back there.” Blunt as usual.

“Then why are you here?” This time Tova’s voice was softer, not liking the way she had spoke to him before. Just because she was in a foul mood didn’t mean she had a right to disrespect her only family left. The sound of shuffling feet made their way to her before there was a presence to her left.

The dark haired girl looked over at Levi, who was staring up at the stairs. She could have sworn she saw familiarity in his eyes. At the look of familiarity, Levi looked down with a deep frown. Tova watched as he stared at the ground in thought. Then his gray eyes shifted towards her as he spoke.

“After an argument with Isabel and Farlan on whether or not I should kill Erwin alone, I came here to think.” Levi paused to shift into a more comfortable position on the ground. “But they soon found me. At the time it was cloudy so I had complained that it was no different than being in the Underground. Then the clouds drifted away and we admired the beauty. And at that moment I decide to believe in them like they asked me to.” Tova’s lips went to curl up into a smile, but stopped at Levi’s next word. “And obviously I didn’t believe in them as much as thought or I wouldn’t have left them to chase after Erwin.”

“It wasn’t your-”

“I know, you made me realize that Tova. I’m telling you this so you’ll know that I believe in you no matter what, and nothing is going to change that. I’m not going to let history repeat itself.”

Tova was speechless as she stared at the man before her. He stared back, his eyes not once leaving her’s. She couldn’t help it as she scrambled into his lap and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. Surprisingly enough, Levi returned her hug but it was far more gentler than Tova’s. Leaning his head on her shoulder, he whispers, “I miss them.”

“Me too, Black Panther.”

*****

“So...” Tova began with a wide grin. Her and Levi had spent a good time holding each other, grieving one final time. Grieving over their deceased friends. They both had already had a moment to do so, but this time it was different. They were finally able to grieve together. Though Levi wouldn’t admitted it, they finally let out the last of their tears. Now they were ready to remember their memories of the two without hanging sadness.

“So what?” Levi retorted, his thin eyebrows raised slightly.

“You got an eye on someone in the Corps?” Tova winks as Levi looks at her with a hard stare.

“No.”

“Mhm, sure...” She drags out her words with a smirk spread across her face.

“The only people that I would be even remotely comfortable with touching me would be you or Er-” Levi suddenly stops purposely, not wanting to finish the rest of that sentence.

“Me and who, Levi?” She asks dumbly but her rising smirk gives her away. The raven says nothing, avoiding her gaze. “Ah! I know could it be the titan shifting cadet named-”

“Tova.”

“-Eren!” Levi looks down at his boots, suddenly finding them interesting. This causes Tova to poke his, now red, cheek. “Your blushing!”

“Tch.”

“You know he likes you back right?” She asks with a smile. Levi looks up at her, his cheeks slowly becoming paler.

“It’s just hero worship.” He grumbles.

“And how long has it been going on?” Levi looks away again.

“...six months” Levi mumbles so low that if it was windy, Tova wouldn’t have heard him. Her blue eyes widen as her smirk does.

“Yes, defiantly hero worship.” Sarcasm is thick in her voice, he ignores her jab.

“Why are you asking?” Levi says, a sigh following it. Tova just shrugs and sends him a smile before turning her gaze up to the sky one final time for the night.

She may tell him her reasoning later on, but not now. Tova couldn’t tell him that she wanted to make sure he was happy if Tova was gone. Since Nile knew she was alive, anything could happen. If Erwin’s, whatever it is, plan fails, she could be killed. Maybe even be sent back to that dull cell to be raped over and over again. Tova knew if this was to happen Levi would do anything he could to get her back. It was a nice thought, but Tova wasn’t sure if she had the same amount of hope as she did in the Underground. Levi said he didn’t want to repeat history. Sure he may not have meant it in the way Tova was thinking, but she was positive it would carry over to that too.

She didn’t know when he would tell him, but right now Tova was going to do everything she could to push the two boys together so her dear _Black Panther_ would still be happy if they loss.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	13. Chapter Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova relives how she met Levi, Farlan, and Isabel. Only to remember something that was very important to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I got this chapter done fast! I decided I needed to get the "how they all met" scene out of my system before we go back to the present time problems. Also I realized I left Armin out of the chapter when Tova met the 104th squad, I'll add that in probably tomorrow, they won't be big changes but may be interesting.

**Six years ago...The Underground City**

_They yelled curses at her as they attempted to chased her down. Tova just smirked, jumping onto the next roof in her path. When would they learn they weren’t going to catch her? If the Military Police couldn’t, what much better are they? They might as well give her the supplies instead repeating this chase every time she showed up._

_As their shouting began to quieten, meaning they’d lost her, Tova slowed down to a stop. She just grinned as she achieved victory again. A shadow in the corner of her eye wiped her grin away. Someone was trying to take her off guard. The thug groaned mentally, before taking off across the roof again, acting like she saw nothing._

_A metal hook charged towards the roof to her right. Tova gritted her teeth, subtly she gripped her knife waiting for the right moment. The sound of gas leaving a canister has Tova twisting her body around. She swipes her blade through the air with out thought. It is followed by a curse and the crimson of blood._

_She doesn’t take time to see what damaged she did to the person. Instead of jumping to the next roof, she jumps onto one of the crates in the alleyway. Hurdling herself off of it and trying to make a break for it. But the only exit is already blocked by two figures._

_“Damn it.” Tova cursed to herself as a third figure swings them self down in front of her. The thug recognized the gear the three used, the same gear the Military Police used. But these people were thugs just like her, they just some how managed to snag the gear._

_Gripping her knife tightly, Tova gazed at the figure who was in front of her. Her eyes met with one of the most coldest gaze she had ever seen in her life. They were male and had jet black hair, pale skin and gray eyes that made his glare so nasty. She had also noticed the cut on his cheek that had blood slowly seeping from it, he must had been the one following her on the roof._

_“Your defiantly not one of the men I stole from, so why were you chasing me?” Tova spoke calmly, a frown following afterwards._

_“What’s your name?” A blonde man says as he walks up to stand by the short raven. Tova eyes him for a moment before her gaze moves over to the last one of the group. At first she thought it was another man but it turned out to be a teenage girl. For some reason a wave of calmness settled over Tova at the sight of the girl._

_“Tova Knight, and who might you three be?” She said with a slight smile. She caught the girl’s lips twitch up, wanting to return the smile._

_“Ah, you were chasing the wrong person.” The blonde says to the shorter male. He then turned to her with a friendly smile. “I’m Farlan Church.”_

_“I’m Isabel Magnolia!” The red head shouted, startling Tova. The girl now wore a bright smile, that made her eyes seem bigger then they already were. Tova couldn’t help returning it before turning to her chaser, waiting for him to inform her of his name. But it never came._

_“Are you going to tell me yours?”_

_“No.” His voice was like a wipe snapping through the air._

_“Alright then, no name, why are planning my murder in your head?”_

_“You cut me.”_

_“So? What did you expect? For all I could have know was that you were the Military Police with that gear you all were some how able to snatch.” No name is silent for awhile, but his glare starts to soften but not enough to get that sharp look out of his eyes._

_“I am sorry though, I’d give you something in apology but all I have was the paints and pencils I just stole.” The three give her odd looks. “What? I like to draw in my spare time.”_

_“Tea leaves.” The raven speaks suddenly._

_“Huh?”_

_“Bring me tea leaves and I’ll forgive you.”_

_“And tell me your name-”_

_“No.”_

_“Will I ever know?” He looks up at Tova, his hard gaze piercing into her’s._

_“When you earn it.” Tova felt a strong feeling of chance. Meaning he had just given her an opportunity to earn his trust and finally have some source of family. This makes her smile as she nods._

_“Alright, I’ll bring you your tea leaves no name. Wait, I don’t like calling you no name. How about...Black Panther! Yes it’s perfect!” She was babbling now in excitement._

_“Tsk.” Is all the raven says before turning on his heel and shooting hooks into the buildings. Then he was gone, Farlan and Isabel took their leave also, waving bye to Tova first. She grinned back at them, watching them until they disappeared from sight._

*****

Tova sighed at the memory with a smile, she hadn’t been able to think of that memory without feeling loneliness. But now she had grieved and could remember the good times. Of course she still felt a small hint of sadness deep in her but it wasn’t enough to stop her from reliving the great moments she had with them.

After her father had died, Tova had no one. She had never known her mother, she had disappeared after Tova turned one. Though her father didn’t miss his formal lover. Her mother had apparently been sleeping around with other men out of boredom, unlike Levi’s mother who did it to earn what money she could. Her father had found out the truth when she had left.

Tova had only once asked about her mother, just once. Her father had sat her down and told Tova the truth, no sugar coating it either. Tova had been sixteen at the time and all she could feel was hatred for her so called mother. Her father had told her not to feel that way about her mother, saying the woman wasn’t worth any feelings her daughter had towards her. _Even if it was hatred._

Now lying on her bed as her roommates chatted among themselves, Tova remembered something. Something that was very important to her that she had left when she was caught by the Military Police. Dread filled her stomach as she shot up from her bed. The girls turn to her startled, waiting for her to explain.

“Do any of you know where Levi’s room is?” She asks urgently. They all nod before quickly giving her directions. Thanking them, Tova runs out the room and continues until she reaches the door. She knocks on the door gently, bouncing on the balls of her feet. The door swings open a second later, a moody Levi on the other side. When the raven realizes it’s her and seeing her expression he gives her a worried look.

“Do you have it?!” Tova says louder than she intended to, confusion spreads across his features.

“Have what?”

“My knife! Do you have the knife my father gave me!” The girl says frantically and Levi’s eyes widen in recognition. He walks into his room without a word, heading towards what must be his desk. Tova follows him in as Levi opens one of the drawers. Pulling out a black box gently, he hands it to Tova with a smile. She carefully takes the box from him before opening it to reveal what she had come here for. There lay the sharp, rounded knife with the maroon handle. A knife Tova’s father had given her after he told her about her mother. The knife that helped steer her hatred at the ones that deserved it.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova is once again called up to Commander Erwin's office to discuss what Nile Dok decided to do with the information of her still being alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy (late) Valentine's Day!!!

“Okami, Commander Erwin has request for you to go to his office after breakfast.” Armin said as he sat down at the table with the rest of the teenagers. Tova couldn’t help but tense up at the thought of going back to that office, and what had happened last time. Then her mind wondered even further into the thoughts of what Nile had done now that he knew she was alive. Those pestering thoughts kept buzzing around in her head until she arrived at said office with a somewhat full stomach. She had tried to eat and act normal but her dread made her lose any hunger she had. 

She knocked on the door, before opening it, to announce her presence. The Commander looked up as the door opened to see the dark haired girl. Tova had actually pinned her hair up in a ponytail today, but her bangs still hung in front of her face. Erwin gave her a nod, a hint of a smile on his lips.

“Levi, Hanji, and Mike will be here shortly.” He said softly.

“Mike?”

“He’s a fellow squad leader like Hanji and Levi.” Tova just nods and takes a seat on the same chair she did the first time she came here. “Just a fair warning, when Mike meets someone new he tends to smell them. Don’t think anything of it though.”

Tova gives a bewildered look as the office door opens. Her gaze shifts behind her to see Levi, Hanji, and a tall blonde who must have been Mike. And like Erwin said, the blonde bent down to Tova and sniffed her. She just stood still awkwardly before Mike stepped away, humming once with a smirk. Ignoring the man’s behavior, everyone turned to Erwin waiting.

“I know everyone is aware what happened a week ago when Nile Dok came here for a discussion.” Everyone nodded. “Nile has decided not to tell the public that Tova is alive, but instead has went and informed Commander Zackly, who has proposed something.” Tova couldn’t tell if this proposal was going to be good or bad. By the look on Erwin’s face, he didn’t seem to know either.

“We, the Survey Corps, are to have mission next week to see if Tova is worth keeping in the Survey Corps.” Levi gritted his teeth. “And if she fails she’ll be handed back over to the Military Police as a permanent prisoner.” The silence before was even quieter now, if that was even possible.

This proposal wasn’t as bad as Tova was expecting. It sounded rather easy considering she had lived in titan territory for five years. But it seemed Levi didn’t agree. His features were twisted into anger, an emotion Levi never tried to hide.

“Your just going to let them take her if she fails? Just like that!” The raven haired man was beyond furious, and Tova couldn’t understand why. Levi knew she was very capable of taking down titans. Everyone else seemed to be on the same page of confusion as Tova. They had all seen the many titans she had left in her wake.

“Of course not Levi, but I’m not very worried about her failing either. She has as much experience as you.” Erwin presses with a deep frown.

“That doesn’t matter to them! We have no idea what they want her to prove out on that mission.” Levi retorts.

“They want proof she is able to benefit humanity, that won’t be very hard.” A gruff voice speaks up and all eyes turn to Mike.

“Tsk.”

“What the hell is your problem?!” Tova finally snaps, tension arises. Everyone looks at the twenty-three year old with wide eyes. No one has every seen someone with the guts to raise their voice at the man. Specially when he’s angry. Levi shifts his angered gaze towards her, she doesn’t even blink.

“It’s not like I’m not getting a chance to prove my worth! I could have just been thrown back in that same cell I was repeatedly raped in! But that didn’t happen, so stop acting like this and believe in me like you promised you would! You’re the one that doesn’t want to repeat history, so don’t let it.” Everyone held their breath as they watched the two. Tova’s words had seem to struck a nerve as Levi stomped his way out of the office with out a word.

Tova peels her eyes off of the raven’s retreating form. She crosses her arms and slumps into the chair letting out an angered sigh. Things never seem to change between the two. Steel blue eyes gaze over at the others with glare she didn’t realize she was holding.

“If only you two were here...” Tova mumbles to herself without even thinking about the other people in the room.

“You knew Farlan and Isabel?” Hanji asked, a little surprise presents itself in her voice. Tova can’t help but tense up at the mentions of her dear friends’ names. Afraid her voice would crack, she just nods to answer the woman’s question.

“It makes sense now, Levi doesn’t want to lose you like he did them.” Erwin says, his eyes not leaving Tova. “He already lost you once five years ago, and now he has you back. You can’t blame him for over thinking this.” Erwin some how always understood why somethings do and don’t happen. Tova had noticed after she had met him, and this was something she admired about the man.

“Do you know where he may have gone?”

“Training grounds, he was supposed to go there after this meeting.” Nodding her thanks, Tova stoop up from the chair and made her way to the door, but was stopped with the call of her name. “And Tova, I’d grab your 3DMG before going.” The blonde man added, before Tova was shutting the office door behind her.

*****

Tova walked into the training grounds, while scanning for a familiar shorty. She could just hear the man’s retort at her jab. After a minute she realized the man wasn’t there and must have already made his way into the forest. Grumbling to herself as she tried to decide which part of the forest to enter, a hand brushed her waist.

“Okami? Am I right?” A deep male voice says cockily. In an instant, Tova jerks her left elbow back and hits the strangers gut. She hears him groan and glances to see him doubled over. Not giving him a chance to recover, Tova grips the back of his neck and jerks it down before kicking the back of his knees. Gasping as his knees buckle the stranger falls to the ground, once again, a groan leaves his lips.

“Don’t touch me. Ever.” Tova says sternly and loud so the people around them would here what he had done. She glares down at him with a glare that she had seen Levi give others many times. The stranger looks at her terrified, not being able to meet her gaze. “Now, where is Captain Levi?”

“H-He went through section f-four.”

Tova leaves without a word as she ignores all the stares she feels on her body. After asking which is section four in the forest, she launches her hooks and soars through the air.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a warning there will be some Ereri in the next chapter...;P   
> Thank you for reading! Please leave feed back, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160  
> Tag: fic: humanities okami


	15. Chapter Fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi explains what happened to Eren and Tova eventually finds Levi in the forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's some Levi Pov. and some Ereri ;)

**Levi’s Pov.**

The raven haired man soared through the forest, while shouting orders to the cadets trailing behind him. He orders them to slip into pairs of two and scout the area for titan dummies. The cadets left after that all except for one teal eyed brat. Of course Eren had to partner up with the Captain just in case he had a titan incident. Even though the boy had become very familiar with his power, people still didn’t trust him. Levi almost felt bad for the boy, key word almost. You see Levi had grown very fond of the boy’s company after he had join his squad and specially after what happened to his original squad.

Interrupting his thoughts, Eren came up next to Levi while scanning the area. The Captain stared at the boy from the corner of his eye. He couldn’t help it, Eren was always practically beaming. And the eyes the boy had would make anyone weak to the knees. Not that the raven would admit that. Directing his gaze else where, Levi’s thoughts drifted back to Tova. He couldn’t help it, his mind didn’t want to shut up about it.

Levi hated the way he had reacted back in Erwin’s office. The raven didn’t like glaring at Tova the way he did one bit. But he just couldn’t get one thought out of his mind.

_I can’t lose her, I already did once. I can’t let it happen again._

He knew that Tova was very capable of being in the Survey Corps. Hell everyone did. But the want for her to be safe at all costs clouded his thoughts. And it still did right at the moment, Levi wanted to change his own mind but it didn’t seem to want to listen. These thoughts were so distracting that Levi didn’t aim his right hook correctly. A startle shout from Eren was the man jerking to attention. With quick movements, Levi was able to swing himself onto a tree branch before he was able to fall.

The man groaned at his mistake, while slumping against the tree. He couldn’t believe he just did that right in front of one of his cadets. _How embarrassing_ , he thought while pinching the bridge of his nose. The raven stayed like that until he heard Eren land beside him on the branch.

“Are you alright Captain? You seem a little out of it.” The teen says, watching his Captain with a worried gaze. Rolling his eyes, Levi straightened up.

“I’m fine, Brat.”

“You’re lying.” Levi almost smirked at how bold the boy was. No one pointedly accused the man for lying without consciousness, no one except Eren of course.

“You caught me.” The raven sighed, closing his eyes.

“Does it have something to do with Okami-, wait I mean Tova?” Levi wanted to smile at the fact Eren corrected himself after saying Tova’s fake name. I’m sure the young woman would have herself. But he didn’t, only looked up, literally, at the boy and his eyes spoke for him.

“Nile Dok founded out Tova is alive and has proposed something. Go on a mission next week so Tova can prove her worth within the Corps, and if she fails she’ll be handed over to he Military Police as a prisoner.” He explains to the boy, keeping his gaze on the boy.

“I’m sure she can handle it, I can’t even count how many titans she killed for us.” Levi’s anger rises again, even though the man shouldn’t be angry. The Captain grinds his teeth together, catching Eren’s attention. “Do you think she can’t?” Eren asks, confusion simmering in his eyes. Levi is quiet for awhile, trying to let his new found anger drain.

“Its not that I don’t think she can,” he pauses as he hears a pair zip by them. Once their deemed gone, he continues. “I can’t stop thinking that I’ll lose her again. That Nile Dok won’t play fair and will take her away from me again.” Levi doesn’t allow himself to say anything more. This was his cadet, he shouldn’t be ranting to him like they were more than Captain and cadet. And for some reason that thought didn’t disgust him like it should have.

*****

**Tova Pov.**

The young woman swings herself off of the trees around her. She had ran into a few other cadets and asked them where Levi was. They told her which direction he went, so Tova of course went that way also. Steal, blue eyes take in the forest looking for the familiar raven.

“Its not that I don’t think she can,” a voice says from below her. Looking down she sees Levi and Eren standing on the branch of a tree. Tova doesn’t dive down there, not yet. She wants to hear what Levi was going to say, so she lands on a branch above them and hides herself among the leaves.

“I can’t stop thinking that I’ll lose her again. That Nile Dok won’t play fair and will take her away from me again.” Erwin was right, that is why Levi reacted the way he did. Tova watches as Eren gazes at Levi awhile before speaking.

“Captain you’ll defiantly lose her if you don’t let her do this mission.” Levi looks away from the brunet. “She’s as good as you, so I doubt the government would hand her over to the Military Police when she’s valuable.” Tova smiles at that and decides it’s time to reveal herself.

“I won’t let them take me so easily either.” Tova drops upside down, her cables the only thing keeping her up. Both of them jump in surprise, Eren more than Levi.

“The hell, Tova?” Levi curses as she stares at the girl hanging upside down. Tova just grins and then flips on her cables so she was up right. Her grin fades away as the tension from the office rises again. Frowning Tova looks away for a moment, trying to collect her thoughts. But before she can, Levi speaks up. “I’m sorry Tova.” Blue eyes widen in surprise as she looks back at Levi.

“Levi...” She whispers and the raven looks away. “I know your afraid of losing me again, but you can’t always make decisions for me like in the Underground. I’m not saying you made bad decisions, but I’m not a teenager anymore. I’ve matured and I can take care of myself, hell I did for five years outside of the walls.” Levi closes his eyes while letting out a sigh.

“Okay.” the man whispers out and Tova smiles.

“Thank you, Levi.” As those words left her lips, Levi opened his eyes and did the unexpected. Firm hands clasp around her shoulders as she was pulled into a hug by the smaller male. Tova couldn’t help but let out a gasp of shock. She looks over at Eren who wears the same expression as her. Shaking away her shock, the dark haired girl wraps her arms around him as well. She rests her chin on top of his head, his silky hair tickling it.

Tova looks over at Eren who is looking away, being an awkward teenager. Tova smirks and slowly grips Levi’s waist harder with one arm before quickly shooting out her other arm towards the boy. Eren gasps as he’s pulled towards the two and is crushed into the them by Tova. Levi shoots his head up, almost hitting Tova in the chin. She grips both males in a tight grip against each other. The two look at each other and take in how close their faces were. Red seeps into their cheeks and Tova can’t help but snicker. That makes the two look over at Tova and she smirks at them. Levi glares at her and Tova knows shes about to have her ass kicked. With a giggle, Tova releases her hold on the two and jumps back shooting her hooks into a different tree. She hears the sound of gas canister and looks back to see Levi chasing her with a murderous glare. Flashing the raven one more smile, Tova takes off hoping that when Levi does catch her the punishment won’t be so bad.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave some feedback, it would really make my day!   
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160


	16. Chapter Fifteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova plays a prank on Levi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got done with this chapter faster than I thought I would, and it's also longer than usual!

Tova walks into her dorm to see her roommates all getting ready for bed. They’re all quiet and stiff as they move around the room. She frowns but she can’t blame them, tomorrow is the last day before the mission. Tova hates to see everyone down, so she decides to do something about it. Time to play a old time prank on Levi. 

She walks past them to her bed and opens her chest. She rummages through it until she finds what she needs. Smirking she lays out five different colors of paint and brushes. She then sits on her bed with a pencil and paper and begins sketching ideas.

“Isn’t it a little late to be painting?” Sasha asks Tova as she jumps to sit next to her while looking over her shoulder. The dark haired girl smirks again as she looks up from her sketches.

“This isn’t just your ordinary painting.” Her statement has all of her roommates looking over at her curiously. Tova then holds up the paper to show what exactly what her painting was going to be. On the paper, there is a rough drawing of Levi but with many designs across his features with color labels.

“It was nice knowing you Okami.” Ymir says as she smirks at her drawing. This makes her chuckle as she takes in the reactions of her roommates.

“Don’t worry I used to do this all the time in the Underground.” Sasha gasps next to her, giving her look like she’s gone mad.

“But won’t he be able to smell it?”

“Nope the paint I have is odorless and only comes off with a special oil and I’m only person who possess it.” Tova explains as the bell rings to tell everyone its time to clock in.

Tova stands grabbing everything she needs and makes her way to the door. Krista hands her a candle and wishes her luck as she steps out of her dorm. She quietly makes her way down the corridor, the candle making it glow.

She first goes to the mess hall, knowing it’ll be awhile before Levi finally goes to sleep. Walking into the kitchen quietly, she sets a pot of water to boil as she continues to sketch more designs on Levi’s face.

Most people would think she was doing this to make Levi look as ridiculous as possible, Tova does the opposite. Instead she paints beautiful designs onto his face to make him take people’s breath away. And hopefully the breathe taking sight will be able to cheer them up.

The screech of the pot makes Tova jump and come back to reality. She walks over to the pot and picks it up and drops a tea bag in it. Turning around to place the pot near her work station, but almost drops the pot as she gasps.

Erwin stands there, scanning the drawing with his blue eyes. His gaze moves to her direction when she gasps. He gives here an apologetic smile as Tova tries to calm her racing heart. Which doesn’t happen because every time she is around the man it picks up naturally.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Erwin’s voice is smooth and deep, not the usual emotionless, commanding voice. They stare at each other for a moment before Tova looks away, her face heating up slightly.

“Don’t worry about it. Tea?” Tova says as she sets the pot down where she originally planned to. Erwin nods, she then turns to the cupboards to grab two tea cups. Sitting them down gently, she begins pouring the hot liquid into the cups.

“This is beautiful Tova, but I’m a little worried as to why you drew such beauty onto Levi’s face.” Tova lets herself give the man a small smirk as she hands him the cup of tea. “Thank you.” he says.

“You’ll just have to wait until tomorrow.” She chuckles and winks at him. Tova’s face heats up at her actions, she didn’t know why but it almost seemed as if she was flirting with the man. Taking a sip of her tea to cover up her blush, Erwin just smiles shaking his head. Swallow the warm liquid down her throat, she speaks up again. “I’m hoping it will help everyone cheer up tomorrow,” Tova pauses as Erwin gazes at her with a rather intense look. “Since the announcement of the mission everyone seems out of it and I can’t stand it.”

The blonde nods in agreement. “I can’t stand it either, no matter how many missions we go on.” Tova for some reason can’t take her eyes off the man. It’s like she was captivated by his voice. “Tova, I can’t thank you enough. For everything you’ve done even though the things you were put through hurt you so. You helped complete strangers.”

The two make eye contact and neither plan to break it. As they gaze each other with no words spoken, Tova notices how close they were. When had they gotten so close? But Tova couldn’t focus on that thought as Erwin began to slowly inch himself closer to her face, closer to her pink lips. A part of Tova wants to run and another part of her wants to slam her lips against his. She didn’t know why she felt like that. When had these feelings for this man develop? Tova could now feel his breathe against her lips and she wanted to panic. But instead of feeling those soft lips on her’s, Erwin tilted his head up and pressed them against her forehead instead. She couldn’t help but gasp, why was this man so amazing and not like the others. Tears of joy wanted to spring from her eyes but she didn’t let them. So instead when Erwin leaned back, Tova raised her hands to cup his face gently. His blue eyes widen but never left her’s. Pulling his face down, Tova leaned up on the tips of her toes and kissed the man on his forehead. When leaning back after a moment she gaze at him with a smile. Erwin smiled back and wrapped his arms around her and pulled her flat against his chest, resting his chin on her head. And they stayed like that long after the tea turned cold.

*****

It had been about an hour since the bell for bed had rung and Tova had made her way to Levi’s room. She carefully opened the door, wincing when it creaked. Not to risk it making anymore noise, Tova only opened it enough so she could slip through. Closing the door back, Tova lifted up her candle. It wasn’t very hard to find Levi, instead of being in bed like you’d think, he was propped up in chair. This didn’t surprise Tova, that’s how Levi often fell asleep back in the Underground. As uncomfortable as it looked, she was glad he was in a chair and not his bed. This means there was a better chance Levi wouldn’t smear the paint like he would if he shifted in bed. Tova began to set up her paints on the desk in front of Levi quietly. She then looked around and found a clean towel folded on his dresser. Levi has already going to be in mood when he discovered what was on his face and he would be in a more worse mood if she got paint on his clothes.

Tova carefully places the cloth around Levi’s neck before reaching for a paint brush. Wetting the brush with a royal blue colored pigment, Tova began her work. With the blue she curved it slightly under his eye and then curved it down to his frown. She then painted two curved swirls along her first curved line. Add dots at the end of each swirl, she got her yellow paint and put three, yellow rain drops around each dot of blue. Satisfied with that she went to red and made a pattern of dots around the outline of blue. Continuing on with her next color, purple, she painted a triangular shape on his chin and in the corner of each cheek. Then she painted a wing on the upper part of his eyelid and connected it with his eyelashes. Now with the her last color, green, she outlined the purple with green dots, similar to what she did with the red. Grinning at her work, she began to pack up her things and put the towel back where she found it. Before she left though, she picked up a blanket at the foot of Levi’s bed and draped it over the man. Looking over her work one last time, Tova left quietly and went to bed herself.

([Tova's prank on Levi drawing](http://wolfish160.tumblr.com/post/158407237606))

*****

Tova sat next to Eren at breakfast, anxiously waiting for Levi to come through those wooden doors. Today everyone was silent, picking at their food while lost in thought. It made Tova frown deeply, making her patience lessen. Gazing around, her eyes caught Erwin’s. Color comes to her cheeks as she recalls what had happen last night. She couldn’t help but send him a small smile, which he returned. The two continued to stare at each other until the mess hall door banged open. Tova smirked at Erwin before looking over at the door. There stood Levi, a very pissed off Levi, whose glare was settle on Tova. She was happy to see the paint didn’t get smeared while Levi slept. Everyone in the mess hall gawked at the Captain as they admired the designs on his face.

“Okami- You know what? Fuck it!” Levi started, furry presented in those gray eyes. “Tova Katherine Knight!” Tova couldn’t help but stiffen as Levi not only said her real name, but her full name. But she didn’t let it get to her as she smirked at him.

“Yes Levi?” Tova said and almost everyone in the room gawked at her. Levi’s eye twitched in irritation as he stomped his way towards her.

“What is the meaning of this?” The raven exclaimed while pointing at his face. Tova just smiled at him and ran her finger across his face, tracing the blue curves.

“Sorry Levi, but I wanted to cheer everyone up before tomorrow.” Levi seemed taken back by Tova’s words, not really sure how to respond. “It’s probably because I’ve only been here for a month but I hate the tension in the air leading up to a mission and I just wanted everyone to have a moment without it.” All the anger seems to drain from Levi as he sighs shaking his head.

“What did I ever do to deserve you back in my life again?” She smiled at him.

“You made up for your mistakes just like I did.” Levi let a small smile curve on his lips, making the soldiers in the room gawk again at the two. “Come on, I’m sure you want to scrub that off.” Tova says, before moving to stand up but is stopped by Levi shaking his head.

“I think I’d like to keep it on a little longer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160


	17. Chapter Sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova is once again back in the place where she had lived for five years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another long chapter!! Also I feel like you all are going to hate me for how I ended this chapter...sorry not sorry!

Wind slivers its way through the horses and the people sat atop of them. Most of those people had a grim face, even with the crowds surrounding them. In the crowds there was shouts of good luck, even shouts telling the soldier not to screw up. And those type of comments almost sent Tova flying off her horse to give them a piece of her mind. Levi had grabbed her elbow as soon as the girl jerked towards the crude comments. The raven shook his head at her, sending her a look of disapproval. “They’re not worth it.” He spoke glancing toward the crowd. “They’re just cowards who couldn’t survive one second outside those walls and they’re just trying to hide their embarrassment and shame.” Tova stared at him for a moment before nodding and gave him a curve of her lips. 

“You’re right. Its just the thug in me wants to awaken again.” She joked but the humor didn’t last as Levi leaned towards her for a more private conversation.

“Tova promise me you won’t leave me again.” The desperation in his voice leaves goosebumps on her arms. “Please.” Levi whispers, his gray eyes not leaving her’s.

“I promise Levi.” The raven looks satisfied and goes to lean away but Tova tugs on his cape. “If I break my promise, you won’t be alone,” She pauses as she takes in Levi’s confusion. “There’s a reason I kept pushing Eren at you.” Tova had never seen the man’s eyes so wide with realization. It makes her want to chuckle but she doesn’t as the gate rises to open the walls.

“Move out!” A voice shouts and Tova would know that voice anywhere. Erwin takes off, the rest of the soldiers follow his lead. Tova whistles and her horse charges towards the opening. For a small moment Tova is eloped into slight darkness of the thickness of the wall. Her mind goes to her time in the Underground and how the only sunlight was through that hole in the dirt ceiling where she learned how to use 3DMG. The thought makes her heart speed up for an unknown reason. And suddenly the darkness is gone and the bright sun blinds her. Her heart begins hammering in her chest, just like it did when she was being drug from her cell and thrown outside of the walls. The panic she had felt that day caused her to forget how to breathe as she had stared up at the wall. And unfortunately for Tova, it was happening again at this very moment.

Her breaths came out as wheezes as she tried to remember how to get the air into her lungs calmly. Tears blurred her vision in the panic and she shook her head with frustration. Tova didn’t think she’d have such a reaction to returning back here, the place where she had to fight for her life everyday. She guessed that this meant that she truly hated it outside of the walls as much as she did in that cell. The panic attack didn’t seem to want to ease anytime soon as she did not realize who was trotting next to her. Warmth surrounds her left hand, her blue eyed gaze snap to the source. Another set of blue eyes, much lighter than hers, gaze at her in worry.

Now it seemed she couldn’t breathe at all as Erwin’s gaze captivated her. His lips were moving as if they were forming words but Tova couldn’t hear them. It was almost like if there was cotton stuffed into her ears to keep her from hearing dirty little secrets. So instead of focusing on Erwin’s moving lips she focused on the warmth eloping her hand. Tova gazed down at the blonde’s hand as it squeezed her hand gently. Suddenly everything snapped and she could hear again. She could hear the thumping of hooves raking against the ground and her name being said repeatedly.

“-ova. Tova? Tova!” She gasped and looked at Erwin, taking in deep breaths trying to take control of her air passage again. Her lips tasted of salt from the tears she didn’t know were running down her face. The warmth on her hand leaves and she wants to sob because of the lost, but doesn’t as the warmth is moved onto her check. Erwin’s hand moves up and down because of the shakiness of riding a horse. “Tova, are you alright?”

The word _no_ is on her tongue but she stops herself and really thinks about the question. When she first had panicked after stepping outside the walls she didn’t snap out of it until she saw a titan in the distance. But this time she was comforted out of it, by Erwin of all people. And she couldn’t be more happy about it.

“Yes.” Erwin cocks an eyebrow. “I wasn’t before, but I am now. Thanks to you.” Erwin slips her a smile and nods before going back into Commander mode. The warmth of his hand leaves her cheek as he sends her one more glance before taking his position back up front. Tova wipes at her face ridding herself from the tears. Feeling someone’s gaze on her, she lifts her eyes up to see Levi. He stares in surprise as his gray orbs shift from her to Erwin. Levi cocks a thin brow at Tova and she just looks away, pink dusting her cheeks. Taking a deep breath, Tova closes her eyes and opens them a moment later. Her steel blue eyes harden into determination.

*****

Tova guessed it had been about an two hours since they left the walls and nothing had happen in that time. No titan incidents, actually there were no titans all. Not one. That should make Tova happy, but it doesn’t. She feels uneasy, after spending five years out here she knows never to trust that the titans aren’t actually there. Oh they’re there, just not showing themselves and that’s what worries her. Another thing that worries the young woman was the dark clouds drifting in the sky that is now a gray instead of blue. Tova didn’t even get a chance to hope the rain would hold off when a splat of water hit her cheek. And at that exact same time a rumble in distance became known.

Tova wanted to believe that it was thunder but it was getting closer each second. She looked around and no one else seemed to notice it. This didn’t surprise her, after five years around the creatures she had come to know the sound of titans anywhere. She looked behind her and gasped at the hoard of titans that were trudging behind them. And then they were _running_ straight at them.

“TITANS!” Tova screamed as loud as her vocal cords would let her. Everyone turned to her to only gasped as they looked behind the girl. Levi glared and quickly shot off a black flare into the air. But it didn’t matter, the rain decided to pour from the clouds and interfered with the black smoke. Tova pulled out her blades, keeping her eyes on the titans even though it was straining her neck.

“Listen up!” Levi shouted gaining the attention of his squad. “We won’t be able to fight them in the rain, we need to get to the forest and wait it out in the trees.” Tova agreed with Levi but there was a flaw in his plan.

“Levi, the forest is behind those titans. They’ll catch up before we could make it to another one.” She informs him with a deep frown that Levi returns. The man grits his teeth and sighs making up his mind because those titans weren’t far behind.

“Tova is right. We’ll need to cut through the titans to get there. I’ll distract the titans and you all make a run to the forest. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes sir!” They say all except Tova.

“Levi I’m going with you.”

“NO! I will not lose you Tova! I lost them in the rain and I won’t lose you too.”

“I have more experience in the rain than they had, even you. I’m going and once we distract them we’ll head off to the forest.” Levi didn’t have time to argue as the titans were literally meters away. “Go!” She shouts at the others and they take off and so does Tova, Levi quickly following her.

Running towards the titans to catch their attention, the two jerk the reins of the horses and lead them away from the rest of the squad. “Tova as soon as you see a chance to escape go to the forest, I’ll meet you there.” Levi shouts through the rain and Tova meets his eyes.

“And so do you.” The man nods but his eyes shift as a titan foot stomps right in between the two. “Damn it!” Tova gasps and jerks her horse right and looks to see some of the titans following her. Finally she finds Levi who is leading the titans the other way. Her gaze hardens and she encourages her horse to beat its hooves harder against the ground. Water falls into Tova’s eye making her blink rapidly so she could see again. This happens frequently through out her trudge in the rain and it begins to irritate her.

A few minutes later it has seem she had lost the titans and was successful in redirecting them elsewhere. Tova lets a grin break out across her face at that and makes her escape like she promised Levi. Taking cover under a near by tree she lets her horse rest for a moment and thank the walls she did.

“Erwin!” The shout slips out without Tova’s control at the scene before her. Erwin laid on the ground, blood pouring over his leg. The girl scrambles off her horse and falls onto her knees next to the blonde. Erwin gazes up at the girl and groans in pain. “What happened?!” Tova questions trying her best to examine the wound through the rain and blood.

“A hoard of titans appeared and someone’s blade got in the way of my leg during the chaos.” The Commander explained through gritted teeth.

“And they just left you like this?” Anger began to surface in Tova. How could they leave their own commander like this?! Erwin gives her a grim look and Tova’s rising anger disappears just like that. They didn’t leave him, they were killed by titans and that’s why he was here alone. They were all gone. Tears began to surface but Tova kept them down as she called for her horse. “Come on we need to get you to the forest.”

*****

Erwin managed to get on the horse with Tova and she lead the horse back where they had come from. And when the two reached the forest they began traveling my their maneuver gear and, instead of going where she though the others were, she went to her old home in the trees and helped Erwin into the cavern. Thunder roared outside as Tova gazed around searching for any sigh of other soldiers. She confirmed there was no others and turned back to Erwin.

The blonde was slumped against the bark while gripping his wounded leg, panting harshly. Tova caught his gaze and she notice it was very hazy and glazed with slumber. Tova knew this wasn’t a good sign and moved to look at Erwin’s wound, ripping the fabric of his pants away.

“Shit.” The girl mumble as she realized all the blood Erwin had lost. Moving quickly, Tova untied her soaked face mask off her wrist and quickly wrapped his wound tightly. He let out a few grunts but other than that the man was quiet, trying to fight off any tiredness. The quietness scared Tova so when she was done wrapping the wound she tapped his face. “Hey don’t fall asleep.” She told him as Erwin groaned and blinked at her before nodding. She sighed in relief and checked over his wound one more time before slumping down against the tree next to him.

“...What happened to your squad?” Erwin mumbled out, shifting to look at Tova.

“As far as I know they should be safe in the forest. We also ran into a hoard so Levi and I lead the titans away so the rest could go to the forest. Levi and I agreed that as soon as we had a chance to escape we’d take it and meet up in the forest. But then I found you so I took you here because if you were to pass out you wouldn’t fall off of a tree branch.” She explained, chuckling slightly at her last statement. Erwin smiled at the small humor and asked her another question.

“Is this where you lived?” Erwin gestured to the tree bark surrounding them and Tova nodded.

“Yeah, it’s saved my life many times.” She mumbled, her eyes gazing over at the wolf she had painted on the wall. It was what inspired her to put the design on the Survey Corps jacket she had been able to snag. Raising her slender fingers up, Tova began tracing the dried paint with a small smile. She could feel eyes on her so she turned and met them. Erwin’s eyes were more awake now and the man sat up more straighter than before. His eyes began to harden with something Tova didn’t recognized, and it made her worry.

“Tova I know this is really sudden but,” The man paused for a moment and took a shaky breath. Tova was confused, what had made this man so shaken? Why did he seem nervous? After a moment she found out why. “I think I’m falling in love with you.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you hate me?  
> Thanks for reading! Please leave some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Tumblr/Amino: wolfish160


	18. Chapter Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tova tries to decide on whether to accept or reject Erwin's confession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting close to the end of Humanities Okami. There will probably be 2 or 3 more chapters left. Also there is Ereri but its just a fluff scene.

_“I think I’m falling in love with you.”_ That one phrase, such a simple phrase, kept repeating itself in Tova’s head. Each word making the shock she felt grow to a size bigger than the biggest titan known to mankind. Her mouth lays agape when she believes words were finally able to form but still nothing came. And when nothing came she snapped her lips together. Tova’s mind couldn’t wrap around the thought that Erwin claims he may be falling in love with her. Love was something Tova had experience but this kind of love was very intimate. This kind of love scared Tova ever since she was in that cell five years ago. The place that made her fear men and tricked her into thinking they were all the same. Tova knew there was something different between her and Erwin. She would admit, she was very fond of the man. More than she ever thought she would for a man. And these thoughts are what kept her from responding to Erwin’s confession. 

Erwin was also silent, but his eyes didn’t leave Tova’s. He gazed into her steal blues with such warmth and respect and it made her heart clench. She had expected the man to try and convince her to be with him. Convince Tova to let him fall in love with her completely. Tova was stupid to think so. This man was so careful with his words and actions that of course he wouldn’t beg and guilt her into accepting his confession. He’d let Tova decide whether or not he could be with her. Within realizing this Tova concluded that she had made up her mind and shifted as if she was standing up.

Erwin took this as her rejecting him and was leaving but was surprised at what happened next. Tova had swung her leg over Erwin’s thighs and was now straddling the blond. The man didn’t move a muscle, not even when the girl carefully cupped his face.

“Erwin...”, she trails off, biting her lip out of nervousness. “Help me.” Tova finished and Erwin scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. He went to speak but the girl placed a finger against his lip and went on. “Help me forget that I was raped. Help me forget my father’s death. Help me rid myself from the loneliness I’ve felt for these last five years.” Tova’s request made Erwin ache, oh how he’d fulfill it.

“Yes Tova Knight, I will help you forget your pain, despair, and loneliness by replacing it with freedom.” He accepts and tears spill over her cheeks. Erwin smiles and leans up to press a kiss on her forehead like he did the night before. But Tova stops him with a small smile and speaks.

“No, I want to forget all the lips that have touched mine, do so with the freedom of your lips.” The man gazes at her before nodding softly to the girl.

Again he leans in but his lips don’t touch the smoothness of her forehead, but her soft lips instead. Neither of the two move as their lips are pressed together. Tova’s grip on Erwin’s face tightens gently as she ever so slowly returns the precious kiss. Soon following her actions, Erwin finally moves and holds the young woman’s waist. For once she doesn’t tense up at the hands and encourages them to never let her go. Their lips move slowly together with no intention for it to become more than pure passion. Neither of them could say how long they kissed, but they could admit it was the best feeling they’ve ever experienced.

Pulling their lips away was hesitant but they knew they had to if they didn’t want to go into unwanted territory. Bliss surrounded them as they gazed to one another with curves on their lips. One of Erwin’s hand removed itself from Tova’s waist and brushed her uneven bangs out of her face. She ran her thumb over his defined cheek bone in return. Eventually the coldness from her rain inflicted clothes got to Tova as a shiver ran through her body. Seeking warmth, Tova shifted, all while being careful of his leg, and sat sideways on Erwin’s lap. She hummed in satisfaction and buried herself into his warm chest. Erwin gently wound his arms around the girl and pressed his forehead against her dark hair. Neither moved, not even when the rain cleared and the sound of gas canisters were heard.

*****

The rain had finally cleared, but there was still no sign of Tova. Ever since the Captain arrived into the forest with the rest of his squad he kept pacing the tree branches waiting just to wait again. No one dared interrupt the man’s anxious pacing and stayed to themselves. Though one did, the brunet stood from afar but his gaze was on the raven. The teen couldn’t seem to pry his gaze off of his captain. And lets just say it added more rage to the man’s current anger and worry. So with the snap of his dagger eyes, Levi finally called the boy over. Once the nervous boy arrived by his side he turned to the other members of his squad.

“Eren and I are going to go search for Tova, you all stay here.” A series of yes sir’s were passed around and the man took his leave, Eren quickly following his lead. Eren has never seen the captain like this, so frantic and out of order. The boy’s worry grows so much that he can no longer keep his lips shut.

“Captain stop!” He blurts out and a sharp glare is set on Eren faster than he could say titan. He gulps audibly and the raven’s glare only hardens.

“Would you like to repeat that Jaeger?” Coldness slips off Levi’s tongue like melting ice. The teen almost says no but stops himself and swallows down his fear.

“I m-mean no disrespect sir,” Eren pauses for a moment to gather up his courage. “But you need to stop for a moment and calm down. We’ll never find Tova if you’re a reckless mess.” Levi darts his gaze away and glances down, curses are whispered. To the brunet’s surprise the man lands himself on a branch and slumps back against the tree. Eren joins him, not speaking another word. He felt like he’d said everything that needed to be said, now it was Levi’s turn.

“I-I, shit, I can’t lose her again.” The raven admits, gaze not lifting anywhere towards Eren. He was ashamed. Levi was ashamed that he’d went acted like this in front of his cadets. Levi wasn’t allowed to break down like this, not ever since their death. But to the raven, the thought of losing the last of his family was that remorseful day all over again.

“Captain, Tova is okay I promise you. She was able to live out here for five years, today isn't going to make a difference. So stop doubting her!” Levi finally meets the teen’s gaze at his last statement. For once he can’t mask the dumbfounded look on his face. Why didn’t he realize this sooner?! He was doubting Tova! The girl whose been through way worse than he has himself, yet she is still intact.

It took a moment for Levi to realize the warmth that wrapped itself around his hand. He tensed up as he looked down to see Eren’s hand encased around his. Looking up, the raven was met with a nervous smile and a small blush rising on the teen’s cheeks. “I think I may know where she is.” Eren says and releases the raven’s hand only to have his own captured. Levi grips the boys hand and just stares at their joined hands. The man doesn’t say anything more just holds Eren’s hand for a silent moment. Levi finally looks up at the wide ocean eyes and nods with release of the others’ hand.

*****

Tova wakes up to the call of her name and the brightness of the sun outside. Peeking her eyes open, Tova realizes how warm she is. So warm and safe. She hears a small groan behind her and she smiles. The warmth was Erwin, the man who had only confessed to her a few hours ago. Lifting her head up she meets his bright blues and they smile at one another.

“Tova!” A shout interrupts their gazing, both of them looking towards the opening. Her name is shouted again and this time she recognizes the voice.

“Levi?” She responds and the sound of a cable shooting off is heard. A hook plants itself by the opening of the cavern and a figure peeks in. She instantly smiles as those gray eyes gaze at her. Tova carefully removes herself from Erwin only to be crushed by arms of another. She lets out a surprised gasp as the shorter man hugs her.

“Thank god your alive. I was so worried.” Levi mumbles to her and Tova smiles even more. Returning the hug, she rests her head on his shoulder.

“Can’t loose me that easily, Black Panther.” Levi chuckles at the old nickname and pulls away with a small curve on his lips. Then it seems that the raven finally notices Erwin sat behind Tova. The young woman looks behind her and looks over at Erwin. “How’s your leg?”

“Sore but I think I can walk now.” The blond says and attempts to stand. When he falters, Tova is by his side instantly and helps him gain his balance. Levi studies the two and notices the way they look at each other. He also notices the way Tova comfortably presses herself against the man with no fear in her eyes. Something happened between them and Levi was defiantly going to be having a reasonable word with Erwin later.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...Tova and Erwin, what do you guys think?  
> Thank you for reading! Please leave some feedback, it really makes my day!  
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Amino/Tumblr: wolfish160


	19. Chapter Eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Babe, I gotta know if we can find a way  
> To make this work and make me want to stay  
> Make me stay"
> 
> "Babe, I'm gonna show you we can find a way  
> To make this work and make you want to stay  
> Make you stay"
> 
> Find A Way by Seabird

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent 4 hours last night on this chapter to get it done. I was going to post it yesterday but I was too tired to edit after I got done. Anyways the lyrics above are from the song Find A Way by Seabird (aka the best band in the world) and I decide to put them in the summary because the song represents Tova and Erwin's feeling towards on another. So I HIGHLY recommend you go listen to it! Better yet just go listen so Seabird! They are such a good band and aren't very popular when they should be. And tbh I listen to all three of their albums while writing this chapter. 
> 
> Also another quick note! If you see a part where someone is talking and it looks like this: â€œThank you Erwin.â€� OR you see a word like this: couldnâ€™t  
> Please tell me in the comments because when I copy and pasted the chapter onto here it did that to ALL the quotation marks and apostrophes. Took me a while but I think I fixed them all but knowing me I probably missed one or two. So please inform me if see this and tell me where or what sentence it was in. Thanks!

The time getting back to the walls, back to safety, seemed to drag for all except one. The one who wasn't even sure if they'd still be apart of the Survey Corps once they got back. The mission had been a fail, no news was going to be delivered. Apart of them wanted to run back to their home in the trees and live with the titans once again. But of course there were two people and a thought that kept them on that horse trotting towards the tall slabs of stone.

The two people were Levi and Erwin. Tova could never leave Levi again, she couldn't stand the thought of him going through the pain of losing her for a second time. As for Erwin, if she left now the blond would never be able to fall in love with her like she was going to allow him to do. Tova's heart broke even thinking about the disappointment those blue irises would hold. But the last thing that was holding her back was the thought she would be letting _them_ win. The sick bastards would probably rather have her in that cell but if Tova was still outside the walls it was still a win. She didn't want to let the Military Police win after all they had done to her and probably other prisoners there. Sure everyone needed to be punished for things like murder but that wasn't how they should have punished her. It was sick and fucked up your sanity.

And that is why Tova was unpacking her horse at the Survey Corps headquarters, back in the walls. She was somewhat alone, yes other members were also unpacking their horses, but no one made an effort to interact with her. Erwin and Levi had disappeared as soon as they arrived at headquarters. Though Tova was enjoying the little alone time she had to collect her thoughts and worries. But it seems Tova didn't have much luck when she lift her gaze to her right.

The green, horned horse was what caught her attention first but when she actually took a look at the faces, Tova had wished she did run away back to the titans. It was _them_ , the men who had visited her cell far too many times. The only one not present was Nile Dok and that made her stomach clench. Of course he'd send the men who had raped her to retrieve her from the Survey Corps, that's just how sick Nile was.

She watched them, couldn't take her eyes off them now that she had realized who they were. They called over a soldier and requested to speak to Commander Erwin. The Survey Corps soldier left to do what they asked, but it seemed they may not have needed Erwin now as one of their gazes landed on _her_. A wicked grin surfaced his face as he nudge one of the men and pointed. Tova's steel blue gaze became blurry as tears of pure terror surfaced.

Now they all noticed her, and they were coming straight towards her.

Tova felt like she did when leaving the walls, but this time it was worse. The fear of the titans was so much smaller than the terror she felt right now as the men stalked towards her. She took a step back and bumped into her horse that snorted in protest. Tova glanced back at the horse, she could jump on this horse and run. The horse was still tacked up and ready to be ridden. Though before she could two figures now stood in front of her. She almost panicked but the overlapping wings kept her from doing so.

"You requested to see me?" The words coming out of his mouth was ice. The question itself didn't sound like a question, more of a threat. Tova had yet to hear Erwin sound so cold, so threatening. Levi, who stood next to the blond, held a glare just as cold, if not colder. The men didn't say anything just nodded at the man's question. "Why are you here?" Again, was that even a question?

"We're here to retrieve Tova Knight."

"With what right? What makes you have the right to take her?" Tova noticed how white Erwin's knuckles were because of how tight he held his hands into fists. The Military Police seemed a little hesitant to answer. Tova couldn't see Erwin's face but by the looks the men held it must had been terrifying.

"The mission was a fail, so that proves Tova being apart of the Survey Corps doesn't improve anything." She shivers in disgust as the man says her name like he did when she was face down on those dirty sheets. "The deal was if she could prove herself she could stay, but she didn't so she's ours."

"I refuse, as the commander of the Survey Corps, to turn Tova over to the Military Police without taking this to court. Tova Knight has proven herself worthy and I will plead that case." It is dead silent throughout the courtyard, everyone had their attention on Erwin. The four men are quiet, looking at each other in a silent conversation.

"Fine, we'll report this to Commander Dok." The man says as his eyes drift from Erwin to the trembling Tova behind him. "We'll make sure you get that same cell as last time Tova." Levi scoffs as they turn to leave. The raven made a step towards the retreating Military Police, Tova twitched her hand on reflex to stop him but she was still frozen in place. But she didn't have to worry because someone else was already one step ahead of her.

"Captain don't, remember what happened last time you were reckless. If you never would have calmed down we'd never have found Tova if she had been in actual danger." Eren says with the most respectful manner he could. If Tova wasn't so out of it, she'd pick up the development in the two's relationship. She'd smile, happy to know that her ridiculous plan worked.

Tova didn't smile, she didn't feel happy. Instead she forgot about her horse, she brushed past the two men that kept her from running away and left.

Looking away from Eren, Levi opens his mouth to call to the retreating young woman but stops himself. His gaze moves to the blond man standing to his right. Erwin had his eyes trained on Tova, Levi saw fondness in his eyes along with sadness. Making up his mind, the shorter man spoke one sentence.

"You never leave her side and if you don't think you can keep that promise, then don't start following her now."

*****

Darkness has made itself present on the other side of window that Tova peers out of. After the incident with the Military Police Tova had locked herself away in an empty room and began to draw until her anxiety had calmed. She didn't realize until now how long she'd been drawing. Looking back at her drawings she noticed something. Each drawing was of a different part of a body but each part belong to one particular body. To be exact it was Erwin who she had been drawing and Tova couldn't help but feel her cheeks become warm.

With a sigh, Tova collected her drawings and tucked them in her pants so they now pressed against her back. She left the room, thankful everyone seemed to in their rooms. Tova walks down the hall carefully as she tries to remember her way to his office. After a couple turns she found the office and it seemed to be just in time as Erwin stood outside the door locking it. She walked to him and Erwin looked over to her at the sound of footsteps. He smiled at her and she couldn't help giving him one in return even though it was small.

"Why are you walking down here, the dorms are all the way down there?" Erwin points down the hall behind her. Tova looks up at him as a blush begins to rise on her cheeks.

"I wanted to see you." Her voice barley surpasses a whisper but the blond defiantly heard her as his eyebrows rose in surprise. She looked away embarrassed, but she soon shifted her gaze back up to the man when a warmth surround her hand. Erwin held her hand in his and stroked the back of it with his thumb gently.

"We can go back to my quarters if you would like?" He offers while still stroking the back of her hand. Tova doesn't trust that her voice will be audible so she just nods. Erwin stops moving his thumb and brings Tova's hand up to his face. He presses a gentle kiss to it before lowering their hands. Her face becomes pink again but doesn't look away. They begin walking down the hall and Erwin never lets go of her hand so she doesn't release his.

As their boots thump against the wood floor, nerves begin to bubble in her stomach. Tova began to worry about what was to happen once they got there. In a bedroom contained with two people who felt attraction to one another could cause many things to happen. She knew Erwin wouldn't force anything from her but she was afraid that she'd disappoint him. Erwin may not force her to do anything but what if he gets annoyed because she refuses to do anything. A part of Tova knew he'd understand but her anxiety overpowered that knowledge. Before she knew it they had arrived to Erwin's room and had already stepped inside.

"Make yourself comfortable." Erwin told her with a gentle smile as he closed the door. Tova makes her way to the bed and sits down on the soft comforter. She removes her boots and sets them to the side and stretches her sock covered toes. Looking back at Erwin she silently gulps as he also makes himself comfortable. He had removed his boots along with his brown jacket that hung on the back of a desk chair. But what made Tova gulp was when he began loosening his bolo tie and unbuttoned the top button of his cream, white shirt.

Tova's nerves hit at full force now causing her to look down at her hands. She begins to move her fingers in odd ways, something she often does to calm herself. Erwin notices this and takes a seat next to Tova, looking at her with concerned filled eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asks softly and Tova stops moving her fingers. Her gaze slowly moves from her hands to his light, blue eyes.

"I know you won't do anything but maybe kiss me," Tova pauses for a moment at the thought of them kissing. Shaking her head she continues, ignoring the nerves bouncing around in her stomach. "But I can't help but feel nervous about being in your room." She finally confesses to the man. Erwin is quiet and Tova is almost scared by it but when she _really_ looks into his eyes she finds pure fondness.

"Because there's so much that can happen in a room filled with two people who feel mutual attraction." Erwin states and the young woman's eyes widen. She was surprised that he said it exactly as Tova had thought herself.

"Exactly." She mumbles with a small smile at the shared thought.

"Tova I don't expect anything from you except for you to be your complete self with me. Don't be afraid to stop me if we are doing rather intimate things. I'll stop every time and do anything to make you feel comfortable again." Erwin let out a surprised gasp when lips were suddenly pressed against his. Though he smiled into the kiss and closed his eyes. Tova had wrapped her arms around his shoulders and kissed him. She couldn't help it after the amazing things he just said. When they pulled away she didn't cover the bright smile she held on her face.

"Thank you Erwin." He just returned her smile and pulled Tova into his arms. She couldn't help but still be surprised at how amazing of a man Erwin was. Why couldn't all men be somewhat like him?

Tova welcomed his warmth as she curled up in his arms. Now with all her nerves gone, she asked him something that surprised the both of them. "Can I sleep here tonight?" Erwin looked at her stunned and a little loss for words. Which was funny for a man like Erwin who seemed to always know what to say in no matter what situation.

"Of course, you can take the bed and I'll-"

"No if I'm sleeping here its because I want to be with and I can't do that if you sleep on the floor." Tova said with a smile and Erwin couldn't help but hold her tighter as he laid out on the bed, pulling Tova with him. Tova giggled and made her a place on his warm chest.

Eventually the two got up and removed the leather harnesses from their body. Erwin had given Tova one of his sleeping shirts and she had gone to the bathroom and changed. She didn't want to sleep in her jeans so she decided to just wear the shirt and underwear. Luckily the rather large shirt went down to her thighs but her bare legs were still on display. But Tova pushed the thought away and exited the bathroom with her clothes in hand. Erwin glanced towards her and his eyes instantly went down to her bare legs. They didn't linger long enough to make her uncomfortable and Tova appreciated that. When Tova realized that all Erwin wore was pajama pants and nothing else. She couldn't help but stare at his sculpted chest. With a light blush, Tova looked up at Erwin's face. He had a brow rose and Tova gave him a glare that had no bite.

Erwin just smiled and Tova playfully rolled her eyes with a smile of her own. She set her clothes on the small desk in the corner before making her way over to Erwin who now sat on his bed. Tova crawled over to the side against the wall and laid her head down on a pillow. The smell of Erwin filled her senses and she let out a sigh of content. After blowing out the candle on the nightstand, the blond joined her in the bed and pulled blankets over them.

Neither of them moved for a while until finally Tova wormed her way over to Erwin who already had his arms opened. She nuzzled into the man's warmth and rested a hand against his bare chest. Erwin had an arm holding the back of her shoulders and the other rested on her waist. And soon enough the tiredness of the day caught up with them, causing them to fall into a deep slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Tova and Erwin's relationship so much!! And after watching episode 36 yesterday I was itching to write about Erwin. I've come to really love Erwin since writing this fic so after watching him in that episode my love for him grew. (even though I read the manga and already knew that was going to happen but watching it was so much more emotional)  
> Anyways thank you for reading and please leave some feedback it really makes my day!
> 
> Instagram (cosplay): @wolfish.160  
> Amino/Tumblr: wolfish160


	20. Chapter Nineteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I-I…” Tova trailed off as tears began to well up. She didn’t want to say the word, never even liked to think of the word. But she had to, needed to so all this would finally be over and she wouldn’t have to tell what happened to her because everyone would already know. So with a shaky breath she stalked over to the five men who ruined her and said loud and clear what they had done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise greatly for not updating! This has been a crazy year for me and school hasn't been helping much, but I'll try my best to complete this story soon because I may only be writing one or two more chapters for Humanities Okami.

When Tova woke up, she felt a powerful gaze set on her resting face. The gaze felt familiar and warmer than any other gaze she had felt before. And she knew that it was Erwin’s icy, blue gaze. Her long lashes fluttered as she opened her eyes only to snap them shut at the bright sun that was also gazing at her through the window. The young woman heard and felt Erwin shift and noticed how the light bearing down on her eyelids dimmed. Tova again opened her eyes and this time it was Erwin’s broad shoulders that blocked the sun’s view.

Blinking a couple times her eyes moved up the man’s chest to his face noticing the relaxed smile on his lips. Tova’s lips curved up slightly as she brought a hand up and traced over Erwin’s sharp jaw and cheekbones lightly. The blond’s smile widen as he leaned into the other's touch humming softly.

“Morning.” Erwin’s voice was gruff from sleep and Tova loved it.

“How long have you been up?” She cupped the side of Erwin’s face.

“About an hour or so,” He yawned just as Tova’s thumb ran over the man’s lips making her thumb bump against pearly, white teeth. She moved her thumb away a little embarrassed by that but Erwin didn’t do anything but continue smiling softly at her.

“You didn’t have to wait on me.”

“I wanted to.” Erwin says and turns his head towards Tova’s hand and kisses her palm, placing his own hand over her’s. Tova’s lips finally curved into a full smile as she leaned forward and brushed her lips over Erwin’s in a teasing way. Erwin’s grunt made her giggle as she noticed the man’s eyes playfully narrowing at her. “Already starting the teasing first thing in morning?” He joked and Tova just winked and finally pressed her lips against the others’ for a tender kiss. The blond gladly kissed Tova back squeezing the hand on his face gently.

A knock on the wooden door interrupted it all as they pulled their lips away from each other, glancing at the slab of wood.

“State your name and business.” Erwin sits up a bit while Tova just leaned her head against his chest listening to his beating heart.

“It’s Armin Arlert sir! I’ve come to inform you that Mr. Dok approved of letting you plead your case in court. You, Tova Knight, and Captain Levi’s squad is to report to the courthouse in an hour.” She began to hear the wild beating of a heart, but it wasn’t Erwin’s, it was her own. Tova’s fingers clutched onto the other's skin as fear made itself known. “Thank you Arlert, you are dismissed.”

“...What if they don’t believe that I am an asset to the Survey Corps?” She whispers clutching onto Erwin with a tight hold.

“Then I’ll fight as hard as I can to not let them touch you. They could cut every limb I have and I’d still fight for you to stay by my side, Levi’s and the whole Survey Corps’s side.” Erwin’s statement helped calmed her newly found racing heart but not her nervous insides. All she could manage was a nod as she glanced out the window watching as the sun slowly rose.

She eventually was able to finally mumble a question she had wanted to ask for a while. “Is the man deciding where my placement should be a unprejudiced man?” Tova’s dark eyes looked at the blonde watching the way his eyes met her’s and told her the answer she seeked.

“Despite the mask he holds, Zackly does consider every word that comes out of anybodies mouth while during and out of court. He agreed that my plan to bring Levi and…” She frowned a bit not wanting to hear their names at the moment. “The others in would benefit the Survey Corps. The man even allowed Eren, someone who could've been a traitor, to join us instead of the Military Police.” Tova’s eyes widen at that her lips opening slightly in shock. And then Erwin smiled his eyes simmering in happiness. “The day we found you Tova we weren’t on a mission to kill titans, we were there to find and bring the mysterious Okami back to the walls. And mind you Zackly suggested it so I’m sure he’s eager to meet you.”

Tova couldn’t help but curve her lips up in relief with the information Erwin had just given her. “So there’s possibility Zackly may favor me just a little?” She joked a bit her fear from earlier steaming away. Erwin chuckled softly and gave a nod as he laced both his hands in Tova’s slim fingers.

“Everyone has their favorites, even Zackly.”

“Should I tell Zackly what they did to me?” Erwin tilted his head slightly as he thought.

“Only if asked about what happened to you after you were arrested. If you mentioned it out of blue they would think you were lying.” His gaze softened as he looked down at Tova against his chest. “I can help if you want me to.” She considering saying yes but instead shook her head.

“Thank you Erwin but I can’t accept your offer, if they’re going to believe the truth they need to hear it from the mouth of the person who knows it.”

                                  *****

Tova wasn’t allowed to wear her gear nor her Survey Corps jacket so she wore her original jacket marked with wolves. It had been washed on her first day being at headquarters so the years of blood stains were gone and it had lost its foul smell. She was glad to see all the rips and tears were still there reminding her of the close calls she had outside the walls. Also reminding her how she was able to survive the punishment that was thought to lead to her death. The jacket hung on her shoulders as she walked beside Hanji and a soldier from the Military Police that Tova was glad she didn’t recognize.

The huge courtroom doors opened for Tova as she walked in and slammed behind her before she could even think of running. She glanced up at the painted ceiling, shivering at images it held walking forward to the center. The soldier left to join the Military Police side as Hanji gave the young woman a hug and departed to the Survey Corps side on Tova’s left. Tova tried to swallow down her nerves as she glanced over, eyes settling on a familiar blond who already had their gaze on her. Erwin gave a comforting smile that was only for her. Her eyes lowered and met dagger, grey eyes that held worry and anger. The former thug nodded at her fellow former thug, who sighed nodding back.

Then a man with grey hair and glasses sat in the judge's chair and the session began with a shiver down Tova’s spine.

“To confirm,” Zackly gazed down at Tova’s form before continuing. “You’re Tova Knight, age twenty-three, and were born in the Underground City.”

Her throat felt dry as she opened her mouth. “Yes sir.” He gave a stiff nod.

“Five years ago you were arrested for your crimes as a thug. Your biggest crime was murdering a soldier of the Military Police, which got you the punishment of death by titans. Is that also correct Miss.Knight?” Her hands balled into fists as she nodded. “Please speak your answer so it can be recorded.” The man said dryly.

“...Yes sir.”

“With that settled I’d now like to hear what each military would like to propose for Miss.Knight.” Zackly glanced to Tova’s right. “You first Commander Dok.” Tova could feel the man’s smug smirk as she glanced to the right for the first time. All five of them were at the front sickening Tova with their gazes.

“Thank you Commander Zackly,”

“Ass kisser.” Tova faintly heard Levi mutter under his breath.

“I propose that since Tova Knight didn’t comply to her punishment and she also didn’t prove her worth in the Survey Corps, that she should be handed back over to us to be our permanent prisoner.” Nile stated and Tova wanted roll her eyes but refrained, though she knew Levi did.

“I see, now Commander Smith your proposal.” All eyes shifted to the blond as he opened his mouth to speak.

“This isn’t so much a proposal but me speaking the truth that Tova Knight did indeed prove her worth, long before she was brought back into the walls.” Erwin paused to let everyone take his words in, as Zackly placed a hand on his chin thinking for a moment.

“Proceed.”

“As you know for the longest time there was a mysterious soldier that wore wolves that was killing titans and taking supplies off fallen comrades. After finally bringing this person we called Okami back to the walls, we were sent onto a mission to prove their worth. The Survey Corps didn’t bring back any new information but Okami sacrificed themselves to lead away a herd of titans. In the process found me unable to fight because I had wounded my leg. Okami helped me into a tree to wait out the storm as they treated my wounds saving me from the mouths of titans. And today that person is here present before us,” The commander gestured to Tova. “Though we don’t call her Okami anymore but instead we call her by her name Tova Knight.” Tova smiled secretly to herself as everyone was still in the courtroom the weight of Erwin’s words hanging above their heads.

Zackly hummed before turning to Tova. “I have one question for Tova Knight and then I will make my decision.” She bit her lip anxiously as she gazed at the gray haired man waiting. “Miss.Knight do you believe you’ve served your punishment for murdering a soldier from the Military Police?” Her answer flew out of her mouth before she even gave herself time to think.

“Yes sir, I do.”

“Why?” This time the young woman’s answer was hesitant as she glanced at Erwin asking if now was the time to tell the real truth. Erwin nodded his eyes sending her the comfort she needed. Tova then glanced at Nile Dok and it was her turn to give him a small glimpse of smugness that made the man pale. Looking back at Zackly she took a deep breath, this was it.

“Because of the punishment I went through before I was kicked out of the walls to be eaten by titans.”

“A different punishment?”

“Yes sir.”

“And what was this punishment I was unaware of?” Zackly’s eyes shot over to glare at Nile who was sweating through his uniform.

“A few months before I was given my real punishment, on the first day in my cell I was assaulted by the five men standing up front and was for the rest of my time in that cell.”

“What do you mean by assulted Miss.Knight?” He asked calmly like he knew the answer would be hard for the young woman to mutter out.

“I-I…” Tova trailed off as tears began to well up. She didn’t want to say the word, never even liked to think of the word. But she had to, needed to so all this would finally be over and she wouldn’t have to tell what happened to her because everyone would already know. So with a shaky breath she stalked over to the five men who ruined her and said loud and clear what they had done.

“Those men you call soldiers raped me!” A breath was not heard after those words were shouted into the air of the courtroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Please leave some feedback it really makes my day!
> 
> Instagrams: @wolfish.160 (cosplay) & @wolfish.draws (art)  
> Amino/Tumblr: wolfish160


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